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Date Posted: 07:29:05 12/04/00 Mon
Author: AngelOfire
Subject: Falling Down Drunk

Falling Down Drunk

Falling… falling
Head is spinning
Hands are shaking
I stop thinking

Wandering back
To the other side
To look at places
Where I used to hide

Part of me wants to go
Part of me says stay
But I feel the need
So off my path I stray

Can’t see straight
Drank too much love
Should have checked
What it was made of

Slowly crossing the bridge
I sway back and forth
Feet over the edge
It’s darker than before

Guess there’s not much light
Over there on that side
I remember it well
It’s where I almost died

Shall I proceed?
Now I feel faint
I see love
But I feel hate

Where’s this coming from?
I was fine before
What’s drawing me back
To my fear and terror?

I stumble and fall
Head hits the ground
I open my eyes
Confusion all around

Pick myself up
Am I there now?
I guess so
I made it somehow

It is plain to see
This side is so different
But ever familiar
Past, future and present

Where to go first?
To my ledge I suppose
But I can’t see my way
Don’t know where to go

Darkness and blur
When did this start?
Oh yes I remember now
When I opened my heart

Opened it here
On the dark side
The reason that
I had to hide

Guess I better close it
For the time being
Until I go back
So I can start seeing

Ok there, its closed
I must be safe now
I proceed through shadows
Though I don’t know how

And then I hear it ~
That friendly soft voice,
“Let me help you my dear”
As it blocks out all noise

I feel the warm hand
But nothing do I see
What a sensation
How did they find me?

I feel suddenly warm
And safe on this side
I welcome ‘its’ company
And suddenly I see light

Ahh…the light, the light
Followed me to the dark?
I’m thankful but cautious
And I still close my heart

I have to because
Things are lurking out there
Will the light protect me?
Or let me do what I dare?

I feel the guidance
As we proceed on
I let ‘it’ lead me
So I won’t go wrong

Finally I had to ask,
“Where are you leading me?”
Then the soft whispered voice,
“Trust me, soon you will see”

And I did trust them
And we did proceed
I wanted to know
But there was no need

Suddenly I feel
A cold gush of wind
I stumble and fall
Breaking our connection

I look all around me
Just dark blacks and blues
Ice cold wind chilling
I’m numbed and infused

Infused to the core
With this ice and wind
Where is my light?
Why’d it leave me again?

I am so lost now
I don’t know what to do
Pick myself up
And still follow through?

I just stand and stare
Vertigo sets in
Body cold and shaking
Oh no, not again

I try to walk on
But I slip into sin
Falling down drunk
Drunk on love I’ll never win

(end of poem, not end of event)

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