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Date Posted: 23:34:12 10/15/02 Tue
Author: Alien Bob
Subject: Alien girl's bike

Greetings, crazy earth predictions folk.

Please accept my apologies that I have not yet made it down to your rhetoric planet during your current earth association football season. I'm finding it a little hard to get time off work at the moment.

Sadly, my next leave is not due until your earth year 2182; so for now I will have to make do with watching the results come in on my megavortex synchroandrebox. I believe that the closest item resembling this communications device on your crazy earth would be something like a cross between a mobile phone, a boat and a Tuesday at 3:51pm.

I have enjoyed watching your crazy earth predictions competition so far this nova, and look forward to many more shocking and table-turning results. I would also be most interested in crazy informative details regarding how I could get hold of a crazy earth girl's bike? I have contacted our representative on earth (Sphhwgropphynifx H - or just Mark H to you) about this, but regrettably his reply was to offer me out. A crazy earth "punch your lights out you stupid alien" was not in fact precisely what I was looking for.

I should also wish to express my admiration towards your crazy earth patience during your association football duels. Here on planet Hgddddhjenkf each game lasts a total of 3.14 gigastyplns - approximately 53 of your crazy earth seconds. And we don't have injury time either. Blimey - 90 minutes? You truly do have crazy earth staying power! Except people with beards of course, who are not widely respected on planet Hgddddhjenkf. And don't get me started on people who have five ears or more...

That Maric H from your crazy earth Croatia, he seems like a really nice bloke.

Anyway, in honour of your crazy earth PPL, I should like to submit my guest predictions for the Hgddddhjenkf period 336th Dmnskotya to 9th Ljqj (i.e. this coming Saturday on your crazy earth Gregorian calendar):

Rovers team of Blackburn 0-0 United team of Newcastle
Team of Everton 0-0 Team of Arsenal
Team of Fulham 0-0 United team of Manchester
City team of Manchester 0-0 Team of Chelsea
Team of Sunderland 0-0 Ham United team of West
Bromwich Albion team of West 0-0 City team of Birmingham
City team of Leicester 0-0 Team of Burnley
City team of Norwich 0-0 Team of Millwall
Wednesday team of Sheffield 0-0 City team of Bradford
Wimblekeynes team of Miltondom 0-0 Palace team of Crystal

Greetings to your crazy earth folk; and, as we say on my planet, Hey Hey Hefner!

See you all in 2182.

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Replies:

Those predictions have as many goals as you do!!!! hee hee (NT) -- Super Keeper, 13:28:52 10/16/02 Wed
- Maybe on your crazy earth Saturday afternoon, you will be laughing on the other side of your egg, crazy earthling. Heh heh heh... (NT) -- Alien Bob, 22:16:20 10/16/02 Wed