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Subject: Eager College Student Author: India [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 03:23:11 01/17/05 Mon Yesterday, I had an abortion. I agonized over the procedure and decision for about a month before making my decision. The father of the unborn child cares absolutely nothing about me or the pregnancy and make several promise to help me pay for the procedure and stay with me during the appointment, etc. I believed him until he stopped answering my phone calls. So I talk to the unborn and God and made a promise that if this every happens again, I will have the child but I will terminate this pregnancy due to the fact that I have one year left in undergrad. I have all these things lined up in my future and one careless night I made the biggest mistake in my life yet. I spent two weeks looking for the right clinic. During my stay in the office (I was there like six hours) the assistants treated me with the utmost care and one woman in particular made it a point to make sure I was ok throughout my stay. The procedure was not easy (I am being as real as possible) but I made it just like everyone else. I was ok hours after leaving the clinic and even until about three o'clock today but then it dawned on me that I lost a part of me that I will never get to know. I explained to my unborn child that this is a very hard world to live in and I want to make sure his/her entrance would be the best possible. Growing up African-American in this country is not easy despite the fact that people believe race relations are progressive ...the fact is that they are no one near equal--especially in the south. So, I did the best thing for me and my unborn child. I am really sad today but I certainly look forward to tomorrow, when I can help provide the best options and opportunities for my children. [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Subject: Re: Eager College Student Author: Pat [Edit] Date Posted: 03:29:13 01/17/05 Mon India, It is a virtual certainty that you don't know how you will react to your abortion long-term, since you only had it a couple of days ago. If you reach a point where you feel you need to talk, we are always here. I was going to school when my older daughter was born. I was a year and a half from graduation. I went to school continuously from the time I became pregnant. She was born in the middle of the semester, and I was out for a week, but came back and aced my classes. I went on and got my degree after that. I would like to have you think about something. Why should you as a person of color have to undergo an abortion because of discrimination? It seems to me that's like caving in. Why should your child pay with his or her life because of the prejudice of others? I would rather see a woman stand up to prejudice and not let it affect her life and cause her to turn on her own flesh and blood. Like I said, if you need anything, please let us know. As long as you thought you did the right thing, I'm not sure I understand why you came. Maybe you can let us know. Pat

[> [> Subject: Re: Eager College Student Author: Amber [Edit] Date Posted: 06:00:47 01/25/05 Tue Pat, I know you are understanding & caring, but some of the things you said are kind of disturbing to me. I know that by getting an abortion you are terminating the life of an unborn child, but do you have to state it as "your child pay with his or own life"? To me that sounds like blame. Also, "to turn on her own flesh & blood." There's no need to state things in such a way as it causes one to rethink what they did & then feel guilt or more guilt towards their actions. I am not trying to cause a debate or anger you. I am just asking you to look at things from a different point of view. Thanks. India, Thank you. I think I understand what you are trying to say in your post & your reason for coming here is logical. I know how you feel & how you felt. I was a senior in high school when I had my abortion. I knew I needed to finish my schooling & move on to bigger things. When I have children someday I am going to give them a great life because I will have a bright future. If you ever need someone to talk to, I am here.