| Subject: Re: A Man's Trauma |
Author:
Andrew
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Date Posted: 22:20:34 02/21/05 Mon
In reply to:
Kris
's message, "Re: A Man's Trauma" on 09:41:35 02/02/05 Wed
Kris
Thanks for your post. It seems like grieving simply takes time. I find myself thinking over and over again about the circumstances that led to the abortion and ways in which I could have prevented it. If I or my ex girlfriend had known the emotional consequences of having an abortion, it would not have happened. I know that before the abortion, she received conseling - she told me afterwards that the counselor had told her that there was plenty of time for her to have children and that having an abortion would not damange her health or ability to have other children. In summary, the counselor told her that if she didn't feel right about having the child at that time that she shouldn't have it. Although I wasn't there and my girlfriend may have given me only limited feedback on her counseling, I feel that she wasn't given sufficient information on the emotional consequences of abortion. Although, I did not ultimately make the choice to abort, I was also completely unaware of its consequences.
For these reasons, I feel angry that neither I or my girlfriend had access to more information on the emotional consequences of abortion. I also feel that the issue of abortion is so polarized in the United States that people seem to take one of two extreme ideological positions on the issue. My girlfriend was always very sceptical of the pro life lobby and I was agnostic. If there was a secular movement that sought to find ways for women to get thru unplanned pregancies, it would be a very positive step. Instead, the secular folks seem to actually encourage abortion unless a person's situation is preceived to be suitable.
As for religion - I am originally from Northern Ireland and was born a Catholic. The politicization of Irish religion drove me away from the church as was the case for most of my peers. However, at times of grief and pain, I do find comfort in Catholic churches.
Thanks again for your post and for your advice.
Andrew
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