| Subject: unable to control psi |
Author:
roxana
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Date Posted: 13:11:57 10/08/01 Mon
When I was five, I began to feel a strong frustration - this occurred everytime I heard of "magic" - because I felt I should be able to "do things" (or that at one time they'd come naturally to me) and now I couldn't.
At the age of 13, I happened accidentally on a deck of Tarot Cards and started reading them as a game. But what I could "see" for others in the immediate and distant future would actually happen (hasn't stopped yet). Then it started taking a toll - after a while I could only "read" the cards to three people in a row, then only two, and even today I'll open the cards only if a person really needs "advice" as they tend to drain me - and one person is more than enough.
Once, I had a spontaneous impulse to lightly touch and continue touching the hand of a colleague I didn't know well. I did this with the back of my hand (my palms have always felt sensitive), and told him things that to me meant nothing, and to him, a lot - the poor guy had a fright.
In another occasion I was playing solitaire, a family member walked by and I asked him to chose a card and put it back in the deck. I'm hopeless at this card trick. I placed the cards face down, hovered my palm over each one, felt a distinct heat against my palm and knew it was the right card. I tried it once more with the same person, and then I called a second family member and ended up "guessing" the right cards all three times. I have only managed to do this once.
Another time I was with some people and a ouija board. The board got out of control - the little plate placed in the centre with an arrow drawn on it wouldn't stop moving and no one was touching it. Well, I stopped it (don't know how). The lady asking the questions was unsuccessfully commanding the presence to leave. I simply interrupted her, started commanding the presence a few times and the plate stopped. After less than a minute I was doubled up with terrible stomach cramps, got a lift home, managed to get to my bed on frozen legs that wouldn't hold me, and spent the rest of the time shaking until I suppose I fell asleep. It was also the last time I tried that experiment.
The only times I naturally become "psychic" is when I have those cards open in front of me. The other types of sensations just come and go.
I have experienced walking into a home and knowing that something has happend; the phone ringing and knowing who it is, or guessing what someone is thinking. Or thinking of someone and then phoning them, to find out that they were thinking of me. I have a very strong 6th sense for negative situations - if I start feeling uncomfortable about something, or about someone (even if it's the first time I'm meeting them), sooner or later I'll know why.
But I'm hopeless with ESP tests, and at this stage I really don't know what it is that I have.
Any advice or insight would be most appreciated.
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