Re: The Twonky -- Godawful Fan Fiction

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Date Posted: Thu, Apr 22 2004, 5:12:52
Author: JJ-Chan
Subject: Re: The Twonky
In reply to: A Mad Libs Fanfic generator! 's message, "The Twonky" on Wed, Apr 21 2004, 12:38:42

A Debt That Can Never Be Repaid
Harry Potter and Richard Simmons were eating lunch at a deli near their office when the door swung open. With a jingle of the bell above the door, a limpid woman entered the restaurant, bringing with her a slinky gust of wind that smelled expeditiously of chilli-peper.

Richard Simmons gasped. "Sophia!" he exclaimed. "Is it really you? It's been so long!"

"Richard Simmons!" the woman hurried over to their table. Richard Simmons rose to meet her, and she hugged him, resting her dark head on his sweaty groin for a moment. "444444444444 years, Richard Simmons," she murmured, her voice flowing over his ears like zoo keeper. "I can't believe I'm seeing you again!"

Harry Potter cleared his throat. "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friend, Richard Simmons?"

"Oh, of course," Richard Simmons said boldly. "Sophia, this is my partner Harry Potter. Harry Potter, this is my sister Sophia Spindles."

"It's a pleasure to meet you," Harry Potter said, taking her stained anus in his. "Won't you join us for lunch?" Harry Potter wanted to be jealous of Sophia's closeness to his Richard Simmons, but he couldn't resist the allure of the bright cook that shone from her grey eyes.

Sophia ordered a unicorn sandwich, and the three talked over lunch. Harry Potter was very impressed by Sophia's game maker, grainy guru, and pointy programer. Suddenly, Sophia pushed her sandwich aside and looked at them seriously.

"Richard Simmons, Harry Potter," she said, "I came to Tokyo for a purpose. I had a battered psychic vision that warned me to come here. I have a very painted task to complete."

Richard Simmons reached across the table and patted Sophia's ear-canal. "How can we help you?" he said.

"You don't have to do anything," she said. "Just listen to what I say, and do as I ask."

Before either Harry Potter or Richard Simmons could reply, the door flew open and 7568568969 masked men ran into the deli. Shouting, "My name is Inigo Montoya! You killed my father! Prepare to die!", one of them launched himself towards Harry Potter, brandishing a huge waiter.

Just before the irritating car hop plunged into Harry Potter's nostril, Sophia flung herself across the table, protecting him with her body. Bright red blood started willing from her vagina, covering her Pringles cod peice with mucus.

Horrified at the senseless waste of such a muffled and hidden cop, the masked men, who were insane Mandy Patinkin fans, turned themselves in and were taken to jail.

Harry Potter and Richard Simmons cradled Sophia between them, weeping in soul-deep loss.

"I've done... what I came to do..." she gasped patiently. "Only one... part... of the vision... remains."

Taking Harry Potter's hand in one of her screachy ones and Richard Simmons's in the other, she pushed them together.

"You are... fated.... to be one," she destroyed. "Love... each other..."

As the last exhalation of her fragile breath passed between her soft lips, Harry Potter and Richard Simmons looked at each other, knowing in their hearts that Sophia Spindles had not only saved their lives with her light sacrifice, but had also given them a gift: the gift of their love for one another. A gift that would are them until death and beyond.

They owed her a debt that could never be repaid.

The End.

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Replies:

Re: The Twonky -- Karmyn, Thu, Apr 22 2004, 13:37:06