I am SOOOOOO confused...I know you have all heard this before, but.......m -- January 98 Playgroup

[ Show ]

Support VoyForums

[ Shrink ]

VoyForums Announcement: Programming and providing support for this service has been a labor of love since 1997. We are one of the few services online who values our users' privacy, and have never sold your information. We have even fought hard to defend your privacy in legal cases; however, we've done it with almost no financial support -- paying out of pocket to continue providing the service. Due to the issues imposed on us by advertisers, we also stopped hosting most ads on the forums many years ago. We hope you appreciate our efforts.

Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your contribution is not tax-deductible.) PayPal Acct: Feedback:

Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):

[ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 ]

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Date Posted: 08:31:30 05/07/03 Wed
Author: marshun
Subject:

I am SOOOOOO confused...I know you have all heard this before, but.......m

I am still on a yo-yo act of knowing what to do and not knowing what to do. It is very frustraiting. I know that if Terry doesn't feel there is a problem, there is no room for recovery. I know that his mood swings are a result of his using and the depression that causes the use. I know that I do not want the children exposed to an environment where people(me included) hold in their emotions instead of expressing them. (I am getting better at tihs). I Know that I want them to feel a father/husband should do more on their days off than lay in the bedroom.
I also know that I can look into Terry's eyes and see a very tender man. I know that he adores his children and he does love me. I believe that part of his relationship flaws were taught to him by his father. I believe that he CAN change....I also KNOW that I can't force him to change. I believe he is going to resent me for not allowing him to do what he deams okay.......or he will just use behind my back(which he has been doing since I found the stuff a couple weeks ago). I checked yesterday and his stash is now gone...which in turn means a week or two of withdrawl where his moods REALLY swing.
I believe the kids and I can make it on our own. I believe I need to decide what to do before this move...I also believe that I am not very welcome in Alabama. I feel his sister and her husband are somehow attributing his not getting better to me. As thought it is something I have or haven't done.
I JUST want to do what is right. The problem is I can not convince myself that either of my options are right. I am going to go to a Nar-anon meeting today at lunch time. I think I need to talk with them and maybe even get info on other meetings. I can bring the kids to this one, but if I go to one at night, I would rather not take them...the language is sometimes a little harsh. I wish there was a magical potion that would allow me to know what is absolutely the right thing to do. I know that there is no such thing. *SIGH* Just call me confused.........

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]