The Top 16 Signs You Got a Bad Dog Show Judge (Part II) -- thecoffeeshop

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Date Posted: 18:14:36 02/21/05 Mon
Author: LaneyLounge
Subject: The Top 16 Signs You Got a Bad Dog Show Judge (Part II)
In reply to: bboop 's message, "What a hoot!!" on 18:58:14 02/19/05 Sat

The Top 16 Signs You Got a Bad Dog Show Judge
(Part II)

16> Just gave your schnauzer a blue ribbon in the "small enough
to fit into my pants" category.

15> When your dog refuses to play dead, the judge shoots him.

14> To the males: "'Sup, dawg?" To the females: "Yo, biatches!"

13> To make sure they meet regulation requirements, he insists
on trying on all the collars personally.

12> She demonstrates to each dog the proper leg-lifting technique.

11> He searches the "toy" dogs for palpable battery compartments.

10> He blindfolds himself, whacks your dog with a stick, then
looks for candy.

9> Refuses to feel the dog's testes unless the dog buys her
dinner first.

8> Judge Magoo just gave the blue ribbon to a bag of dog food.

7> Backstage, you see him surreptitiously accepting an envelope
from a member of the "Bitches Gone Wild" camera crew.

6> Refuses to render his judgment until after the swimsuit
competition.

5> Fake-throws the ball, then deducts points if the dog falls
for it.

4> Asks you to please move your big-white-with-black-spots-
whatever-the-hell-kind-of-dog-that-is.

3> Not only encourages, but actually adds points for leg-humping.

2> She says your prize Shih Tzu is the ugliest monkey she's ever
seen.

and Topfive.com's Number 1 Sign You Got a Bad Dog Show Judge...

1> He judges the dachshund group based solely on how they look
under a blanket of sauerkraut topped with a mustard swirl.

Pretty funny stuff, huh (((boopster))) Glad you and the pups liked 'em. :-)

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