Subject: Ten Today |
Author:
Diane
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Date Posted: Saturday, January 13, 08:56:11am
In reply to:
JenniferS
's message, "Happy Anniversary LFN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" on Saturday, January 13, 08:49:42am
Ten Today
“Happy Birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday dear Paul,
Happy birthday to you.”
“What is this?”
“Why, it’s cake, Paul. Your birthday cake. What’s wrong?”
“I believe I distinctly requested yellow cake. This is not yellow cake. This is chocolate. The depth of your incompetence is overwhelming.”
“I’m sorry, son. I’ll bake a yellow cake right away.”
“Don’t bother, Mother. You’ll probably screw that up as well. Thanks for nothing.”
§§§
“Happy Birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday dear Madeline,
Happy birthday to you.”
“Why does she get a cake and I don’t? It’s not fair. I want a cake.”
“It’s Madeline’s birthday, Sarah. You’ll get your very own cake on your birthday, okay?”
“No! I want cake now. I want that cake!”
“Madeline, why don’t you give Sarah your cake? I’ll make another for you later. Sometime.”
“Don’t worry about it, Mother. Why don’t you just give Sarah my present as well. What is it? A doll?”
§§§
“Joyeux anniversaire
Joyeux anniversaire
Joyeux anniversaire, Michel,
Joyeux anniversaire."
"Thank you."
"What’s wrong, Michel? Don’t you like your cake?”
“It’s fine, Maman.”
“Is there something wrong? Are you all right?”
“I’m fine. Thank you for the lovely dinner. May I be excused, please?”
“Of course.”
§§§
“Happy Birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday, Nikita,
Happy birthday to you.”
“Now, get me another beer. Do you want one, too, uh…?
“Steve.”
“Right. Nikita! Bring two beers for Stevie and me. What the hell. Make it four.”
“Here, Mum. Umm, is there any cake?”
“Cake? Do I look like I’m made of money? You wanna friggin’ cake so bad, why don’t you pick up the empties and cash ‘em in? Might be enough for a bran muffin!”
“Yes, Mum. I’m sorry. Thank you.”
§§§
“Happy Birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday, dear Seymour,
Happy birthday to you.”
“What’s this?”
“It’s a birthday cake.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s your birthday.”
“Please don’t patronize me, Matron. I’m quite aware of the date. Why did you bring me a cake? You never have before.”
“Because…well, it’s tradition. People eat birthday cake on their birthdays.”
“I see. Thank you.”
A beat.
“Could I have Oreos instead?”
§§§
“Happy Birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday, dear Wally,
Happy birthday to you.”
“Ah, gee, Mom. I’m 10. Do you think you could call me Walter?”
“Of course, honey. I was just teasing you. Wally is a little boy’s name. You’re all grown up now, aren’t you?”
“Yep.”
“I’m very proud of you, Walter. I love you, son.”
“I love you, too, Mom. Thanks for such a great birthday.”
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