Re: On the Lord - another try -- ExUBF's Parlor_Free wheel as far as u can from UBF

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Date Posted: 17:02:15 03/11/05 Fri
Author: Anonymous
Subject: Re: On the Lord - another try
In reply to: Mike K. 's message, "Re: On the Lord - another try" on 23:14:05 03/08/05 Tue

>Dear Anon,
>like you said, you know little about marriage, and
>when I was single, I also used to think like you.
>Thing is, in marriage 2 people become blended into a
>oneness that far surpasses all other oneness in this
>world.

I acknowledge that my knowledge here is much inferior to yours.

>Your spouse, you have "for better or for
>worse". All of your spouse's decisions and actions
>affect you, and whenever your spouse just disagrees
>with you without a reason, it puts a slight strain on
>the relationship.

You are right to bring up this point.

>You know, this issue boils down to the difference
>between law and grace once again: is it a law
>that you must be one with your spouse? No. But it is
>grace that you can actually be!
>To disagree without reason is unreasonable in marriage
>(just think, not giving reasons is reasonable?
>Paradox, isn't it?)

Sounds good.

>If you make the table on actions and "rewards", you'll
>see that either the husband or the wife are better off
>if one party does the other's will, rather than go
>separate ways for the day.

Point from gaming theory taken and appreciated.

>Just like I said, if the wife is okay with the
>husband's decision, fine. But if she isn't (i.e. her
>benefit of doing the husband's will is lower than not
>doing it), then she better make it clear for her
>husband why.

Again, I will throw this at you: what if you swap "husband" for "wife" in the above? Is that also acceptable? If not, you are relegating the wife to being a second-class citizen in marriage.

Regards,
Anonymous ex-UBFer

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Replies:

Word games -- Mike K., 23:26:31 03/11/05 Fri
- Satisfied with your response -- Anonymous, 09:36:13 03/12/05 Sat