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UBO
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Date Posted: 04:32:24 03/31/05 Thu
From The University of the Bleeding Obvious
Pig
Residents in Trenton, New Jersey, are raising money to send local boy Milton Pope
to New York, so that he can push a pig off the top of the Empire State Building. To our
knowledge, no one has ever pushed a pig off the top of the Empire State before, although
in 1962 a ram was ejected from a window on the 75th floor. There are also unconfirmed
reports of a racoon seen teetering on a balcony at various times during the winter of
1975. Only last week, Pope very nearly succeeded in shoving a rabbit off the top of his
local all-night gas station. Nevertheless, he isn't complacent about his chances in New
York, and realises that he will have to undergo a good deal more training before he's
ready to tackle 'the big one' as he calls it. He's been practising his technique for many
months now, and much care and consideration has gone into the selection of the right pig.
Pushing farmyard animals from the top of tall buildings was briefly popular in the forties
and early fifties, but the practice has been in decline in recent years. Nevertheless,
Milton Pope is a driven man. When asked by a local newspaper exactly why he wanted to push
a pig off the famous landmark, he replied simply, "Hey, everyone's gotta have a
hobby."
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