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Date Posted: Wednesday, March 29, 11:05:07am
Author: Gluteus Maximus
Subject: A Public Service Announcement from The Holy Roman Empire

Now look here you ungreatful Peckerwoods, I worked long and hard to get where I am now, and for these peasants of Williamston to spit upon my good name makes me sick. To all my faithful followers, you shall be rewarded with gifts upon your wildest dreams, the #1 gift being, to be in my presents in the same room as I am.

That’s right! I am the new CREW Heavyweight Champion, I pinned that no good trailor park snakes head to the ground for the win, now low and behold I OWN Williamston now, so your going to get over it and like it! The ungreatful Peons of Crew will bow before my feet, they will worship the Holy Roman Empire and each and everyone one of you will love me for it! Muahaha!

Look on the bright side, before The Roman Empire came to Williamston, there wasn’t anything good about the place anyways. It’s run down, it stunk like a dirty toilet and there were a bunch of buck toothed redheaded step children running around like wild animals. Now that there will be order enforced through out the land, things will be running my way or as some may say, Hit the highway! I will rule with an Iron fist, and I dare anyone to stop me. Who among me will dare take that chance?

Shane Falco, Pfffft! He is nothing but the buzzing of flies to me! Just like before and the time before that, he will not be successful. He will either succum to the ways of the Empire or he will be Descimated! He will then realize he is a small man with a pitiful dream of being CREW Champion! He is of no concern to me.

I dare the powers that be to defy the Holy Roman Empire, for they will come to find out that The Power of Zeus is on my side and for whoever they throw in front of me, a challenger as they see it, bring forth this pitiful man just to watch me strike him down in front of the peasants, I will break the will of the people and send the challenger back to the bottom of the list from which he came from and then and only then will all you realize the true Power of Z-Z-Z-Z-Zeus!

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