Depends on what they're crying for... -- Irish Dancing Topics

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Date Posted: Tuesday, September 20, 08:12:20am
Author: TC
Subject: Depends on what they're crying for...
In reply to: kleenex carrier 's message, "Is It OK for a Teacher to Make a Child Cry? (NOT talking tears of joy)" on Monday, September 19, 03:24:15am

I've made many children cry because I ask them to do things over and over again, then they get frustrated when they don't understand what I am showing them. I have one student, who when she was 11 or 12 refused to practice anything new I was teaching them during class because she didn't want to do it wrong (and not because I'd get mad!). She'd hide behind a pillar and cry when I asked her to dance. I also had one kid who danced like she needed to get somewhere in a hurry. I jokingly told her that I would throw her in the garbage if she didn't slow down; so I picked her up just to tease her and she started to cry -- I felt awful! I've also had kids cry because they didn't understand what I was trying to get them to do. I'm also a very practical and realistic tell-it-like-it-is person and two of my girls made up a dance to do at her school talent show, which I thought was great, but pointed out that she would not have time to do a shoe change like she had wanted and I guess she bawled at home.

This last story is the one that I regret the most in my teaching career. I was 19 at the time... One of my girls would purposely do things worse when I corrected her. If I told her her arms were bad, she'd stick them out further; if I told her her feet were not crossed, she'd uncross them more, etc. I got so fed up at one class I humiliated her infront of the rest of the kids. I felt horrible about it, and her mom told me she wanted to transfer after that, but she stuck with me, and we've both grown up a lot. She's been with me for nine years, and is my best student, and works very hard, so I guess I didn't do any permanent damage. She also admits that she was an insolent brat at that time!

I can't count how many times I used to cry in class, but I think it was because of my own stubbornness and stupidity. I was injured frequently in my early teens, but wouldn't stop dancing and my teacher would make me do things over and over and over... I'd try not to let the tears fall, but they spilled over sometimes. She'd yell at us a lot, not to belittle us, but to get us to dance better, and that made a lot of kids cry. I'd cry for the other dancers who were getting yelled at as well.

It all depends on what the dancer is crying for in my opinion. If they cry because they can't handle hard work, then yes, it's okay for a teacher to make them cry. But if she humiliates them like I did in one of my stories, that is definitely NOT okay.

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Replies:

I like you, TC. You are humble, practical and human. I respect the way you recognize -- like me, Monday, August 04, 09:01:41pm