<font color="red">WARNING: This Promo May Cause Uncontrolable Orgasms! -- HWA's Interview Room

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Subject: WARNING: This Promo May Cause Uncontrolable Orgasms!

Author:
Ferg

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Date Posted: 10:04:49 02/10/02 Sun

The scene opens up where Sean is filming a television commercial for Fancy Pants, Incorporated's upcoming birthday extravaganza. He's seen in the center of the wrestling ring wearing a Fancy Pants, Incoporated t-shirt. He's got a rubber dummy dressed like Jake Tanner in a headlock.

Ferg: Could we move this along? This rubber dummy is starting to smell like the real thing! And you haven't vomited until you've been in close quarters with Jake "Stinky" Tanner.

Director: We're trying to move this along as quickly as we can.

Ferg: Well, what's the hold up?

Director: We're trying to get the lighting set up to get your features lit well.

Ferg: As a proper commercial should display my best features. However, I don't understand what my...

Ferg reaches down and cups the Fergness in his pants. The director cuts him off.

Director: What I mean is, we want to get your chizzled muscles and your prominant chin. We want to show the world that the people that endorse Fancy Pants, are beautiful people. And they can be beautiful people too, if they just read it.

Ferg: Yea, but did we really have to use Smelly here? Couldn't we have done a spot on the beach with some bathing beauties?

Director: Cuba Gooding, Jr's got that commercial already.

Ferg: Well what about lying in bed with Danni, doing like a "Peace, Love, and Fancy Pants" type thing. An homage to Lennon.

Director: For a proper homage to that whole thing, you'd have to be naked.

Ferg: I have no problem with that.

Director: Well, for that we'd have to get these special lenses that would be able to pick up your smal...

Ferg drops the rubber dummy and walks toward the director anticipating the end of the sentence.

Director: ...it's just not in the budget! We'd have to get special equipment to film in a confined space like a bedroom. That's what I meant was small. The bedroom. Yea.....

Ferg: Don't you get smart with me! I'll climb up there beat your ass to look like Esteban's woman!

Director: You doknow that she's set to be in this commercial too, right?

Ferg: Oh, so I guess you have an ugly lense?

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