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Date Posted: 09:27:12 05/05/07 Sat
Author: Martinelly Martins
Subject: Pier Editing to Adriana Assis
In reply to: Adriana Assis 's message, "Task Two" on 17:59:15 05/02/07 Wed

> The Crusaders (P) by Stefan Heym and Catch-22(P) by
>Joseph Heller are two books about narratives of war.
>The first one describes certain events like a Fourth
>of July leaflet; the American Army helped to liberate
>Paris, and it operated a radio station in Luxemburg;(R)
>the Battle of the Bulge and it(X) encircled the Ruhr area
>and Germans penetrating American lines in American
>uniforms, and(Bw) some of them were executed. Similarly(P)
>the second one was inspired by American political(Ww),
>military, and social events of the 1950s, but it is
>more about(V) than the World War II(Wo), it is also about the
>Korean War and the Cold War. Both of them there is the
>collusion of business in war in a different ways(Q).
> According to the novel The Crusaders(P) the collusion
>of business is around(Bw) a group of officers in what is
>called Propaganda Intelligence which is distinguished
>primarily for its level-headed and generally balanced
>view of a conflict(??)(R). They are apparently interested
>only in graft, but actually cause deaths(??) through the
>necessary functioning of the racket. The opportunists
>are distinguished from the people who beleive(Sp) in the
>war as a crusade, not because they donīt(Sp) know what
>they are fighting for, but because they donīt(Sp) need to
>know.
> On the other hand, the collusion of business in
>the Catch-22(P) is traced by efforts of Yossarian,the
>main character who is an American bombardier in the
>World War II(Wo), to escape his paricipation in a war that
>seems meaningless(//) (??) (R). The author tries to convince the
>readers to settle our differencesinstead(R) of killing
>each other. Besides, the humor lies in pokes at the
>system; the horror stems from the realization that the
>search for indivialism may be futile.
> In brief(P) these facts show that Heym and Heller
>carry the same theme with (Bw) tragedies, conflicts, moral
>violence, torture and deaths but with the different
>points of view. The collusion of business in the The
>Crusaders is interesting for its scope, for the
>ambition that author Heym reveals, for his boldness in
>attempting a major work, and for the odd foreign
>quality, sometimes engaging, of his observations(P). On
>the contrary, in the Catch-22(P) Heller doesnīt(Sp) regard
>patriotism, duty to God and country,(P) or allegiance to
>noble principles as worth goals. He concludes,
>existentially, that society provides a shallow and
>often evil structure for living. It seems offensive or
>disturbing, but it is more likely a result of the
>bookīs irreverence than its violence.

COMMENTS:

I think talking about two works is much more complex than talking about only one. It may have caused some difficult to you organize and develop your ideas. For it must have been much more difficult to narraw the theme like that. Actually, I couldnīt identify a real argumentatie essay here, since I couldnīt find a real thesis statement, you have only described and made comparisons between the two novels. What are your own ideas and arguments about your those works? In this way, I couldn't find a real conclusion either. I have also realized a big problem of punctuation, for example, sometimes you use many unnecessary commans which make the text confused with unclear meaning; and in other cases, you forget to put commnas to separate transitional signals and adverbs. Well, I think that's enough for while, I suggest you try to avoid analysing two works at the same time.

Sincerely,
Martinelly Martins

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