Return to Me reviews - don't read if you think you might like it -- X-Philes World-X-Files Movie 2

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Date Posted: 10:59:26 04/11/00 Tue
Author: kande
Subject: Return to Me reviews - don't read if you think you might like it

Yikes! These are excerpts of reviews in the 4/7 Washington Post:

"Only one last question remains, though it sustains (wanly) the entire second half of the film. That is: What will Bob do when he learns that Grace lives only because Helen has died and that that's Helen's ticker ticktocking away in Grace's chest cavity? Alas, what Duchovny does is truly terrible: He tries to act."

and...

"But "Return to Me" is so phony it makes your gums ache. It's like having your head clamped in a vise and being force-fed sugar cubes by an ex-Up-With-People member who now owns an Amway franchise and knows what's best, dammit!"

and...

"How else to explain "Return to Me," which does for romantic movies what Stalin did for civic freedom? With so many bad movies around, past and present, I guess I should temper my vitriol. But really, this movie is the worst thing I've sat through . . . in days."

and finally...

"RETURN TO ME (PG, 116 minutes) - Contains stunningly brain-dead writing and unnecessarily gruesome material, all of this completely inappropriate for children and, come to think of it, adults."

To show they are an equal opportunity basher, this was in the Post's 4/11 tv column:

"Meanwhile, about 12 million of you tuned in to "The X-Files," which, I'll concede, was an important episode in that it demonstrated that any fool can direct a TV drama series--in this case, star Gillian Anderson."

Ouch!

Needless to say, the Washington Post has not been a promoter of The X-Files. The writers are also a little too enamored with their own cleverness.

krh

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Replies:

My mommy always said if you can't say anything nice....... -- kenamom, wondering if we should kill the messenger, 12:37:08 04/11/00 Tue
- Kill the messenger???!!! -- kande, 13:43:49 04/11/00 Tue
  - You can have the one in my freezer but I should tell you I opicked out all the brownies.....nimmyyumyum (NT) -- kenamom, how about just wound the messenger, 14:18:01 04/11/00 Tue
    - You've wounded me by taking the best part! NIMboohoo (NT) -- kande, 05:14:43 04/12/00 Wed
      - Oh kande, I am soooo sooorrrrryyyy, nimmy (NT) -- kenamom, giving kande a scoop of Cherry Garcia, 07:56:39 04/12/00 Wed
        But I don't like Cherry Garcia. NIMwhine (NT) -- kande, pouting big time, 11:19:13 04/12/00 Wed
        Well don't expect me to share my New York Fudge with you....Nim-handsoff-my (NT) -- kenamom, slapping kandes spoon away, 11:28:29 04/12/00 Wed
        Would you tell your children not to share? NIMtsk-tsk (NT) -- kande, 13:41:30 04/12/00 Wed
        Rice Krispie squares you share, Mommys B&J's is MOMMYS nimknowtherulesmy (NT) -- kenamom who considers eating my B&J's grounds for divorce, 14:37:25 04/12/00 Wed
        Did you hear that B&J sold out? NIMsob (NT) -- kande, 06:07:20 04/13/00 Thu
        NO, too who? nim-yumyum-my (NT) -- kenamom who won't give up her B&J's, 07:45:21 04/13/00 Thu
        Some company called Unilever, which also bought Slim-Fast. NIM (NT) -- kande, who prefers B&J over Slim-fast, 10:28:01 04/13/00 Thu
        Slim-fast and Ben and Jerrys, theres a good mix!!!! nimmy (NT) -- kenamom, 12:06:26 04/13/00 Thu
Ouch! What complete nastiness! -- IOT, 22:51:16 04/12/00 Wed
I didn't know Melody worked for the Washington Post. nim (NT) -- Stardoe, 02:12:28 04/13/00 Thu