KS holds forth about the subject of notes -- X-Philes World-Shipperville

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Date Posted: 20:14:50 04/26/06 Wed
Author: Kande's Sis
Subject: KS holds forth about the subject of notes
In reply to: kande 's message, "KS licks the brick, then sniffs it." on 14:20:21 04/18/06 Tue

Her audience consists primarily of the Dancing Dana's and Red Speedo Revue. They all nod in time to the cadence of her voice and occasionally one gives a little bump and grind. The Mayor is absent-mindedly tapping her front teeth with her favorite fine pencil and thinking about raising revenue for her new pool. Kande is looking at her watch and then stomps over to the basement door.

"You'd better not be sleeping down there, Bubba, or I'll...Oops. There you are." Bubba trips over Kande's big feet as he stumbles back up the steps, flinging the second brick over to KS who catches it neatly.

"Aha! Just as I suspected, another message." KS nods sagely.

"You didn't suspect that," Kande snarls. "YOu just made that up."

"I most certainly did not," KS huffs. She goes through the whole routine of tasting, smelling, and sniffing. When she realizes she has an audience, albeit a bored and cloned one, she adds an extra step of closing her eyes and attempting to intuit the message.

Kande snatches the note attached to the brick and waves it beneath KS's nose. KS continues to stand with her hands over the brick, eyes still squeezed tightly shut but frowns when the note smacks her in the nose. "I'm sensing some frustration," she drones.

Kande rolls her eyes, sighs, and tears open the note. "Special delivery for the Assassin o' Shipperville." What do you suppose that means?" she asks no one in particular.

"It's for KS," the Mayor informs her, doodling on a napkin the dimensions and shape of her new pool.

"I know that. But why is she getting delivery by brick? And through my window!"

KS pulls a tiny chisel from her weapons belt. She pulls on a pair of safety glasses, puts the tip of the chisel in the middle of the brick, and gives it a gentle tap. The brick falls apart down the middle and a slim, silvery oblong can be seen. "It's a mini ipod!" KS exclaims with glee. "And it's engraved with 'Assassin o' Shipperville.' That's me! I love it!"

Kande and the Mayor stare at KS with open mouths. Thinking clearly, Kande steps over to KS. "Happy birthday, Sis!"

The Mayor frowns. "You didn't send her that."

"I most certainly did."

"You threw a brick through your own window?" the Mayor questions sarcastically.

"What's broken glass and the bother of insurance agents when it comes to my sister?" Kande continues to beam at KS.

Now Bubba is irate. Kande had never given him an ipod. Oh sure, she gave him that piece of string for his birthday that he'd used as bait on all the alley cats, but not an ipod.

KS is kissing the ipod. "Now I can listen to all my favorite music."

Kande and the Mayor pale. Even the clones pale. "You mean, like 'As the Neck Turns' by Demon seed?

"Or "Burn Baby Burn" by the Salem Witch Trials?"

KS has the grace to look concerned. "Well, I was going to listen to my music through the ear plugs, but maybe you want me to get some honkin' big speakers so everyone can still listen?"

"Heh, heh! No, no, Sis, by all means use the plugs." Behind KS's back, Kande pantomimes to the Mayor and Bubba what a close call that was. KS waves good-bye to all as she hugs the ipod to her chest and runs off home to show JD.

"That was quick thinking, claiming the bricks and ipod was from you," The Mayor tells Kande once KS is out of sight.

"It was, wasn't it? Got me off the hook. I just hope those notes weren't about something else."

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Replies:

"Let's look at the note on the other brick," says KM. -- kande, 13:45:18 05/01/06 Mon
- A large chunk of the ceiling falls on the Mayor's head -- Kande's Sis, 06:33:43 05/04/06 Thu
  - Kande wipes an avalanche of sweat from her forehead -- Kande's Sis, 19:08:58 05/10/06 Wed
    - Just as Kande wheels around to confront her nemesis -- Kande's Sis, 13:38:50 05/14/06 Sun
      - Not the laundry *basket* IG, it was the laundry. -- kenamom, cluing in, 13:38:05 05/22/06 Mon