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| Subject: Peace, Love & Understanding - We All Need Them | |
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Author: Dennis S Vogel |
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Date Posted: 01:48:44 02/28/15 Sat In reply to: Dennis S. Vogel 's message, "Understand Their Experiences From Their Perspectives [Corrected]" on 22:44:41 02/16/15 Mon Despite a lot of knowledge & trade skill, you can't help customers until they clear out errors in what they believe. What they believe seems real, but they may be denying reality. Business owners also need to clear out errors in what they believe, so they can deal productively with reality. The doctor in the story (below) seemed to care, but he didn't diagnose what was real, he only 'diagnosed' what he believed. This is the point of what I've written here: As a business owner, you have a responsibility to help your market niche members. If you heard things like I wrote in this story, you may naturally dismiss the story teller. But until you know (hear/read) enough details, you wouldn't know if this person is or isn't a niche member. Problems, diseases, injuries, etc. are causes; symptoms are effects. Whether the troubled person is an employee, family member or customer, you probably won't find & resolve every detail. It's important to look & listen for details you can influence & determine what to offer. You may solve part of a multi-level problem & help ease part of the load. Another Day In Paradox I usually advocate treating problems - not just symptoms. Some symptoms aggravate other causes; so reducing some symptoms can help people solve fundamental problems. If we try to solve a problem just on the surface, a situation could become more destabilized & be worse. While a cause still exists, it keeps making effects despite diligent efforts to eliminate effects. It could be like treating symptoms & ignoring diseases. Example- Marital problems affect people's lives at home before & after working hours, but effects of stress persist at all hours. Socializing may change - especially if co-workers, friends & relatives take sides in conflicts. People may wonder whom they should & shouldn't trust. The conflict could spread to your staff. You may have some influence over your staff, but not somebody's marital problems. As much as possible, we should do our best to find & eliminate root/fundamental causes, so we can solve problems instead of only relieving symptoms. How Do We Do That? Certain symptoms are more central to a problem than others. There are more details beyond our perceptions, so we need methods to get details. Though we need to know the causes so we can eliminate those, often we have to start evaluating what made effects happen. Diagnostic Method (in retailing/customer service): 1. Observe & interview to get information 2. Categorize symptoms 3. Determine which symptoms can be caused by one or multiple problems. 4. Determine which symptoms & problems aren't related to what you can offer. The story emphasizes steps 1 & 2. Hypothetically in this story, you're a dietary supplement retailer. As I relay this story to you, you can start determining how you can help. I've inserted comments for you to consider when you determine how you can help this customer. The comments are in [brackets]. These are the kind of things retailers may think of while they hear about customers' problems. You can extrapolate this to your situation when you use steps 3 & 4. I've written a bit of a person's history to emphasize how each person has a load of stress that isn't publicly apparent. Each aspect of a person's life has direct or indirect effects on other aspects. Knowing a little about a person's situation, it's easy to think, "I understand how problematic it is, but how could it be as bad as you claim?" It's important to avoid judging people based only on what others claim to be true. Among the several important points of this story is this: Positive results were possible only after reality was changed. Was Bob's life really as bad as I've described below? Definitely not, it was literally worse (seriously)! But what could any retailer do about Bob's whole situation? Peace, Love & Understanding - But Not For Bob Bob often worked night shifts (sometimes 2 jobs), especially while working for Wal~Mart. He was usually tired & just wanted to sleep. [Some night shift workers benefit from supplements to help them relax & sleep.] His 'home' was the only place he could afford to go. [It wouldn't help to advise Bob to go to a motel.] Though he was somewhat in denial about his situation, he could recognize a "family" war zone. [Dietary supplements won't change other people, but could help Bob be less stressed & more focused. It's crucial for him to try supplements to determine which will work best for him. He needs to start now to prevent deeper, long-term problems.] Some people cared, but couldn't help him. Anybody, who could've helped him, believed lies about him. [He's been hurt, so a failed attempt at a solution may discourage him more.] When Bob asked about additional things he found at home, he was told, "Oh, we had that for a while". When he was told they didn't have enough money to pay some bills, he asked again about the extra things he'd been noticing. Sue (his "wife") was spending money, instead of paying bills; yet she accused him of being a workaholic & of not doing enough to support her & the children. [He doesn't have much money, but he could invest some of his pay in his health. Sue would probably just waste that much money anyway.] When he persisted with questions, she accused him of other things. Often she spread her lies to others including doctors & legal authorities, who investigated him. His participation was required & the hearings were done while he should've been sleeping. [Even when Bob isn't being hassled, he's probably stressed. Stress is making him more vulnerable. Yet if a supplement helps him sleep, he could be vulnerable if he's too sedated.] He felt stress building up, but he figured he survived more severe stress than that. That severe stress was endured in short periods, not prolonged like now in Bob's civilian life. Stress depleted his energy; so mental focus & awareness were harder. He didn't realize he was drowning in stress because he wasn't dealing with reality. [Dietary supplements & medical care could be beneficial by helping him focus on reality. He might find a solution if he's willing to do what's necessary.] His health deteriorated to the point, he could barely work one job, he had to quit part-time work. Eventually, he could only work part-time until the whole stress load was too overwhelming. Then he couldn't even focus on a part-time job. [He may've waited too long to prevent a major depressive episode.] The other employees weren't patient; they didn't like his reduced output or a doctor's orders to reduce his workload & schedule. Medications & less work didn't help Bob. Despite what Bob said, everything the doctor tried was based on Sue's lies. Eventually, Bob tried using over-the-counter dietary supplements. The supplements had some positive effects, weren't strong enough to help enough. [By this point, he definitely waited too long.] Sue stopped telling Bob about unpaid bills. Sue didn't spend all the money foolishly. She saved some for herself, but Bob didn't know it & he didn't have access to it. After too many years, Bob took personal responsibility for what he could do & eventually started recovering. [Now supplements can help him recover more completely.] Dennis S. Vogel thrivingbusiness@email.com Success depends on determining the best actions & determination to do our best. http://www.voy.com/31049/ [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] |
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