Evil Inside? Na. -- FCW Interview Room

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Date Posted: 00:48:14 08/01/01 Wed
Author: The One, The Only, Jason Briggs.
Subject: Evil Inside? Na.

[Jason is shown sitting in the limo Markus rented him, traveling around town. Briggs sighs a sigh of relief and relaxation.]

Briggs:
Nothing like living in the path of luxury, but you, Embalmer, wouldn't understand, would ya? . . .I mean hell, you got your special crew living in a broom closet, and I'm sure you have a thrown in a men's public bathroom . . .Yep, yep, I am livin' large.

[Briggs stretches his arms out and rests his hand to the back of his head.]

Is gold considered a luxury? . . .nevermind that, we both know it is. And soon, well, sooner than you think, I, Jason Briggs, "the rookie", will be stacked full of it, a TV, and an IC belt will be my achievements in these few weeks I an in the FCW, but those won't be my crowning achievements, ohhhh no. For this I will need WORLD GOLD, and I will get . . .well since the title is vacated and all, who better to fill the spot than lil' old me?

But you have a problem with that, I can tell, you don't need to say anything . . .but I'm sure you will, and it will be boring, BUT, anyway I will sum up what you'll say in eleven words . . ."I am the lord of darkness, and I deserve that title!". Was I close? Well if that was what you were going to say, and I think it will be. Lemme burst your bubble right now, you are not worthy to hold such gold, hell your not even worthy to hold my mother's dildo collection. Or a used condom. But I'll tell you what you are worthy of . . .licking the heel of my shoe, cause thats the only offencsive move you'll be getting off this Saturday, when I take your IC belt, to join my TV title in my broom closet in my house. Which is were they belong . . .But to some of you winers out there, to you I am an ungrateful champion. Which is understandable, since i don't care for that TV title. But to me, thats just showing your jealously, at the fact that you cannot be the unbelievable, you cannot be Jason Briggs, and it's those people that won't amount to anything, but below standards.

But with all that said, I still haven't mentioned much about Embalmer. Nor should I have to, he's pathetic.

"Whoooooo, I'm so EVIL! Be scared. Whoooooo, I'm unholy, unlike my tighty whitey's which are very holy, whoooooo."

God, somebody get this man a quarter, so he could call somebody who cares? He's all talk, and the only reason he has the IC belt is because he gives good head . . .well that's the rumor going around on the internet, I wouldn't know. Nor would I want to. But still, I'm going to kick your lil' ass TWO times in one night, I can't wait till you see me reach up and grab that IC and TV titles. And leave you with nothing.

Oh, and you can Believe That!

[Scene fades to black.]

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