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Sure, there are the standard unreliable promotions. By now we all know them. Some of the more jaded among us are even getting tired of them. You may even recognize them because they tend to follow fairly standard patterns:
on-line drug vendors | escrow depletionists | make-believe paper |
---|---|---|
Send real money to on-line stranger. | agree to undertake easy job | send real money to stranger |
Wait and see if you receive anything in return. | receive realistic payment | maybe receive fake money |
Did you use a credit card? Time to cancel it! | deposit payment in escrow account | do not ask why it was discounted |
If anything arrives, put some in your mouth. | wire bulk of payment overseas | try to spend it quickly |
It might be mostly harmless, you never know. | admire realistic quality of check | good luck explaining to police |
Most likely will not cause your penis to shrivel and fall off. | negotiate repayment plan with bank | use real money to hire lawyer |
The problem is that they are getting old. Stale. Uninteresting. It is time to step up into the modern age with our approved group of fiscal separation agents. They offer a wide variety of attractive services, from SEO web wankery all the way to plausible sounding discount telephone service, unwanted art and even medical experts willing to testify for money! Each has a compelling story to tell as to why they should have your money. Since you were not doing anything with it anyway, you might want to listen and find out how your money can explore the world!
So many great opportunities! So little time! If you do not want to miss out, you need to get in touch with the vendors right away. Wait too long, and by the time you reach out to them they may have scurried along to the next scheme, and you will wind up keeping your money.