| Subject: Re: Mountain Biking is Dangerous |
Author:
Col. Sanders
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Date Posted: 15:58:53 11/24/01 Sat
In reply to:
Wipeout
's message, "Mountain Biking is Dangerous" on 23:08:27 11/22/01 Thu
>So now that I have your interest from my subject
>heading...some of you may be thinking, what ever are
>you talking about "mountain biking is dangerous?"
>It's fun! And some of you may also be thinking, well
>duh...of course it's dangerous! I agree...with both
>of you. However, I do not think it is dangerous for
>the reason that you folks think it is...for if you
>know what you are doing and take the needed
>precautions, Mountain Biking can be quite safe (unless
>you are Spiderman (aka John), then it is dangerous no
>matter how many precautions you take).
>
>I would like to relate a story of my most recent
>mountain biking experience up in the Placerville area
>at a rather secluded camping area where I went with a
>friend to bike on the trail there. It is a biking
>trail that runs around a lake that has a lot of
>beautiful sights as you make your way around. Around
>noon or so we stopped at a place on the trail to have
>a snack. We were sitting on a cliff overlooking the
>lake. It was about a one hundred foot drop I would
>say. There we were, the birds were chirping, the fish
>were jumping, and the sun was shining gloriously! We
>were having a nice little chat while watching a lone
>fishing boat with one fellow in it float gracefully by
>us in the water. We continued talking when all of the
>sudden I heard a muffled "POP!" from over in the
>bushes to our right about 50 feet away. I did not
>look over right away because I was distracted by what
>I thought was a splash in the water in the opposite
>direction on my left...about 20 feet from the fishing
>boat.
>
>"What was that?" I said to my friend Mark.
>
>"I don't know" he replied.
>
>I looked at the fisherman.
>
>He looked at us.
>
>I looked to where the noise had come from in the
>bushes. Dumbfounded, I asked Mark, "was that a
>gunshot?" He wasn't sure. The fisherman was still
>staring at us. I looked around some more. The
>fisherman yelled, "Who's popping off that gun!" I was
>hoping that it was not a bullet that I had saw splash
>in the water next to him, so I asked, "Did that land
>near you?". In only a slightly angred voice he
>replied, "Dang right it did!!". Not wanting him to
>think we had done it (since we were the only people he
>could see), I pointed to the bushes and said, "it came
>from over there!" Almost immediately I heard a
>rustling from the bushes. Someone got up and started
>running up the hill like mad. I couldn't believe what
>had just happened. Then Mark had a brilliant idea and
>he said to me, "We'd better get out of here". I
>thought it was a good idea myself. We got our helmets
>on and got on our bikes. We took off like the wind in
>the other direction all the time waiting for another
>shot to be fired.
>
>Then Mark had the great prescence of mind to tell me
>at that moment that this incident reminded him of a
>movie called Deliverence. It's about some guys in the
>woods who get captured by Hill Billies and they toture
>and kill the guys. I kindly asked Mark not to talk
>about that subject at this time because I felt it
>wasn't very appropriate.
>
>We figured in the end that it was some kid playing a
>prank. It wasn't very funny. It landed way to close
>to that fisherman to be an accident. It didn't sound
>like a big gun because the shot was not that loud.
>Either way, it kind of got me spooked. The rest of
>our ride was uneventful, but it was quite a day
>overall. So if you're ever in the woods on a Mountain
>Biking trip, don't stop to talk to any Hill Billies.
>They might try to shoot at you.
>
>And so that is why I say...
>
>Mountain Biking is Dangerous.
Drat! Foiled again! I knew I shouldnt have hired an assassin with only one eye and no depth perception. Actually I'm just surprised that little retard didn't shoot himself in the foot. I'll be sure to give that little bag of snot a good horse whipping when he comes back and tries to tell me that his mission was acomplished. Last time he pulled that I hit him in the face with a shovel and knocked his right eye out (his shooting accuracy has really gone down the tubes after that).
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