Author:
The Mercenary & Sir Max Payne
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Date Posted: 02:07:42 12/23/01 Sun
the cammeras shoot to a weird Room were a christmas tree with presents under it,fire place and a all good warm home like invirment and a table with a hole feast on it inclouding Turky and all the food you would expect at christmas time, then suddenly The Mercenary and Sir Max walk in front of the cammeras with mics and santa claws hats on
Miller: hi avery one and Merry Fucking Christmas, we are your hosts and and this is MILLER'S CHRISTMAS SPECAIL!!!! 2001 (Christmas in hell)
Sir Max: yea thats right Michael, tonight me and Michael have put aside are rivalry and defferances to bring you this show from the hearts of the Miller Family, we will be singing you Christmas songs to get you in the spirit of Christmas, wow im so bloody excited arnt you Michael
Miller: i sure as hell am max, so max i was thinking how about we start off with a goodie, i think you will remember this your dad and known as my step dad song us this avery christmas here ill start singing if you start remembering you can join in
******************************************
Miller puts the mic up to his face and starts singing TWELVE DAYS OF HELL (ORIGINAL)......
Miller: On the (first) day of HELL my true Bitch sent to me
Twelve lords screaming
Max gets a smile
Sir Max: o-yes i remember only to well
Eleven ladies Fucking
Miller: Ten pipers Fighting
Sir Max: Nine drummers dieing
Miller: Eight maids Sucking each other's tits
Sir Max: Seven swans takeing a bloody long shit
Miller: Six geese Blow Jobing
Sir Max: Five gold condoms
Miller: Four stuffd birds
Sir Max: Three french naked ladies
Miller: Two 45 pistles and
Sir Max: A scard Bin Laden in a dark cave
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Miller: Wow that was fucking sweet mabe we should start a fucking band
max gets a weird face
Sir Max: a BLOODY band are mad man i ant starting shit with you, you felthy bugger
Miller: ok ok max i think you need to cool off go eat some crumpets like the British shit hole that you are
Max goes to the table a sets down as mercenary begins to talk
Miller: Now i invited a specail guest on tonight and Payne i think you no this person very well so do i
Max gets a excited look on his face and gets off his seat and goes by mercenary
Sir Max: who the quen plese tell me its her please
Miller: sorry max nope its not her its are good friend JIMMY!!!!!!!!!!
jimmy appears in front of the cammeras, max gets a pist look on his face and gives jimmy a cold hearted look, jimmy goes to mercenary and shakes his hand then jimmy turns to max witch wont shake his hand then jimmy turns to the cammeras, max continues to look mad
Miller: hi jimmy nice to see you we were just going to have a toast to christmas now you can join us
mercenary gets three wine glasses and a wine boddle then poors wine in to all three glasses then hands two of them to jimmy and Max
Miller: TO CHRISTMAS
jimmy,mike,max put there glasses up to toach each others then suddenly jimmys messes mikes and max's glasses and spells it all over max's suit and paints AGAIN!!!!!!
Sir Max: BLOODY FUCKING HELL MY GODD MAN HOW MANY DAMN TIMES ARE YOU GOING TO DO THIS TO ME YOU FELTHY BUGGER YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING BLOODY TODE YOU BASTERD
JIMMY QUICKLY RUNS AS MAX TAKES OFF HIS PAINTS AND THROUGHS THEM AT JIMMY AS HE RUNS max stands there with his british flag underpaints on with a pist look, mercenary bursts out with loughter
Sir max: im outa her bloody hell
max leavs only wearing his british underpaints, mercenary is still loughing
Miller: o well i guess im doing this next and final song alone calld WE WISH YOU MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS......
******************************************
We wish you a merry fucking Christmas
We wish you a merry fucking Christmas
We wish you a merry fucking Christmas
And a happy fucked up New Year.
We want some porn (3x)
And a cup of good cheer.
We won't go until we get some (3x)
So bring it out here!
We wish you a Merry fucking Christmas (3x)
And a happy fucked uup New Year.
******************************************
Miller: ok averyone have a merry fucking christmas and i hope you join me next year good night
the sences go off the air as it shows mercenary setting at the table eating turky and drinking wine then goes black
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