VoyForums
[ Show ]
Support VoyForums
[ Shrink ]
VoyForums Announcement: Programming and providing support for this service has been a labor of love since 1997. We are one of the few services online who values our users' privacy, and have never sold your information. We have even fought hard to defend your privacy in legal cases; however, we've done it with almost no financial support -- paying out of pocket to continue providing the service. Due to the issues imposed on us by advertisers, we also stopped hosting most ads on the forums many years ago. We hope you appreciate our efforts.

Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your contribution is not tax-deductible.) PayPal Acct: Feedback:

Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):

[ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, 2, 3, [4], 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 ]

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Date Posted: 08:07:08 04/30/08 Wed
Author: Varmit
Subject: I kinda found this funny. Was on a message board.

Since nobody has much rodeo news, thought I would throw this in so you ladies know what we go through....lol.

Here's another thing you guys out there have to look forward to when you reach that magic apex of life and start floating toward the blessed end to all this madness. Ooops. What I meant was, "when you get past age 40."

The prostate is one funky little gland due to the fact that the blood vessels flowing through it are some of the smallest in the body. You get little infections in your body all the time, but they're cleaned up naturally before you notice a lot of them. When the prostate gland gets an infection, these little blood vessels don't seem to be able to do a very good job of carrying enough blood in there to help clean up the mess. So the little walnut sized organ begins to swell. When it swells to a certain point, you begin to feel it. It might just be a burning sensation when you whiz. (I love that term. I'll never forget when I was around 18 or so and first heard this girl say she "had to go take a whiz." I thought that was so cute.)

If your ordeal is like mine, however; a burning sensation when you whiz is just the beginning of a life in hell. The next, more painful stage is a pain in your lower back which can shoot down the front of your legs. You'd not believe how much this can hurt. It's that sort of pain where you cannot change to any other position, sitting or lying down, to ease the pain. (I've had folks tell me that it's the same sort of pain experienced to an even greater degree by those who are suffering from pancreatic cancer. I hope I'm never able to verify that one.)

When you decide to find out what the hell is wrong with you, you're in for a real little surprise at the doctor's office. He'll suggest you drop trou and bend over his little table, at which point he will hurt you as much as you've ever been hurt in your life. He'll stick his middle finger up your ass and press real hard on your enlarged prostate gland. He'll be saying something like, "Wow! This thing's bigger than a damn grapefruit!"

But you'll be silently screaming in pain with your mouth as wide open as Al Sharpton at the all-you-can-eat food bar. It will feel as if you are whizzing fire. That's the doctor squeezing out some of the nasty infection which has taken up residence in your little organ. Then the doctor will give you some super antibiotic and tell you to lay off the sex for a couple of weeks. He won't have to worry. There's something else that comes out of your little joy stick other than whiz, and that hurts even worse.

For some reason, the problem will seem to crop up when you've laid off sex for a while and then had yourself a little orgy. For instance, if you've been married for a while, you might relate to this scenario: You get caught up in day-to-day living and forget about making whoopie for a few weeks, and then you go on a week-long cruise with your wife. A couple of days after you get back, there's that familiar little pain beginning in your lower back. I don't know what this pattern has to do with infections, but it sure seemed to be the case with me, and I've had others tell me that same thing.

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[ Contact Forum Admin ]

Forum timezone: GMT-8
VF Version: 3.00b, ConfDB:
Before posting please read our privacy policy.
VoyForums(tm) is a Free Service from Voyager Info-Systems.
Copyright © 1998-2019 Voyager Info-Systems. All Rights Reserved.