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Subject: Scared


Author:
Rae (ehh)
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Date Posted: 09/22/09 4:24pm

I just took a home pregnancy test today and it came back positive. It is to an ex of mine who I was with all throughout high school. We are both 21. We both have been doing our own thing and I guess one nite it just kinda happened but we did use protection that is why I am so confused. Also the guy I am pregnant to already has a 1 yr old daughter..that is what I dislike the most...I dont really know what I am asking for just someone to talk too..

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Replies:
[> Subject: Re: Scared


Author:
Pat
[Edit]

Date Posted: 09/22/09 9:36pm

Hello, Rae,

I am sorry for the difficulty you are having. Protection doesn't work, so there's no reason for confusion. The claim that it does is simply not correct. But a lot of people have been fooled.

Is there any chance at all that you would want to have a relationship with the father at this point? If not, just walk away from the relationship. If you are concerned about custody issues, please find a local organization that can help you; they should be able to find a lawyer who would give you some basic information. Often, the first consultation will be free, and if you work with the organization, anybody they have working with them may be willing to help you as much as needed. To find a local organization, go here:

pregnancycenters.org

Please take care of yourself. Don't consider doing any harm to yourself to solve the problem. It's not worth it. Any method of ending the pregnancy early can cause serious problems, and the pregnancy will end eventually in any case. Check with a doctor and see how viable the pregnancy is. We will be here for you to talk to any time. That's what we are here for, and we'll stick with you through this trying time in your life. Just know that this may well be a blessing in disguise. Many of us have faced this as well. So take one day at a time, and if it is something you do, pray and seek God's will. He creates the baby in His own image. We will also pray for you.

Hugs,
Pat

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[> Subject: Re: Scared


Author:
Sharon
[Edit]

Date Posted: 09/23/09 7:52am

Hi, Rae.

It's pretty overwhelming when you first find you're unexpectedly pregnant. So, don't rush into anything. You have time to think things out. Don't feel pressured by ANYONE to make a decision quickly.

When I found I was pregnant when I was in college, Planned Parenthood really pressured me to decide what I was going to do and even pretty much insisted that I make an appointment for an abortion, saying I could cancel it if I changed my mind. They said, "If there's ANY chance you're going to have an abortion, you need to make the appointment now. You can always cancel it." So, I made the appointment. And, thank goodness, I DID end up calling and cancelling it, but I remember briefly thinking "This is going to inconvenience them - they have the appointment set and everything." Of course I realized how ridculous that thought was once I thought it - they wanted to abort my child and I was worried about inconveniencing THEM?!? Well, to make a very long story short, I now have a wonderful son who has an equally wonderfuly little 10-month-old son of his own. I realize that I held their lives in my hands when I chose to make that call cancelling that abortion appointment. I can't even describe how grateful I am that I did...

Life sometimes throws us some interesting curves. One of the beautiul realities is that those very things we think of as obstacles can turn out to be the most wonderful blessings.

I'll be thinking about you. Hang in there. Be strong - for yourself and for your little one.

Sharon

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