I want to talk to you all... -- Chan Is Missing

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Date Posted: 08:34:58 03/20/02 Wed
Author: V-Dawg
Subject: I want to talk to you all...

I want to talk to you all about something I feel very strongly about.

There are terrorists in our midst. But they are a more subtle form of terrorist. They don't blow up buildings, hijack planes, or kill innocent civilians.

Actually they do, but they do it in a more subtle manner. By robbing them of time.

I'm talking about: road terrorists.

When I'm called for training (or some other bullshit) in the Norwood, Westwood or Canton facilities of my company, because of my current residence, it involves a fairly long highway journey (122A to 190 to 290 to 495 to Mass Pike to 95/128). When I am on this journey, traffic has to flow at a minimum of 65 MPH for me to be slightly satisfied with the progress on the roads.

Road terrorists are the bastards driving Toyota Camry's on cell phones. Road terrorists are the old ladies stradling the demarcator of the right and middle lanes. Road terrorists are the bastards who stay in your blind spot intentionally, and then when you cut them off, act like you shot their dog.

Road terrorists are every where in this state.

Road terrorists kill millions every year, indirectly. By making me wait 50 minutes at the Weston tolls, or attempting to get to 495 South for the leftmost "Fast Lane" toll booth, they have robbed me of 4 hours of my life in the last two days. Granted, I may not have done all that much in those four hours, but I would have liked to have gotten the opportunity to do something. Maybe I would have said something or heard something witty, instead of a squealing alternator belt or me yelling "Move it, Pocket Rocket!". Maybe I would I have discovered an exciting booger. Who knows.

Road terrorists are everywhere. And our only possible security is the Registry of Motor Vehicles. With that being said, don't look for road terrorism to stop anytime soon.

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