pride -- Coolhombres

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Subject: pride

Author:
ak

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Date Posted: 10:56:00 05/17/02 Fri

T, your commentary was very interesting and I have been thinking about it for a couple days...I have been searching my own life for the ways in which I struggle with a proper view of my achievements. I guess, for me, it is a matter of perspective. I find myself in a situation where I am not doing things better than people around me. In every class I have, there is always several people who are sharper and smarter than I am. There are many circumstances where I end up feeling like a major looser. Another situation....I have some friends that I see on a regular basis. Some of them are going through some pretty tough stuff. Every time I get together with them, I find myself trying to speak into their lives in a meaningful way. It never really works and I feel pretty inadequate as a friend. Another situation....marriage. Now, I think that most of us who have been married for any degree of time know that we all end up dropping the ball sooner or later. There are times when I feel like I have sabatoged any good thing that we had going.

On the other hand, there are those moments when I reflect back on where I am and feel satisfied. I used to feel this more often than I do now. These moments seem like they are becoming more and more fleeting.

I guess one of the issues is trying to have a proper view of yourself that doesn't err on the side of pride or lack of self-esteem (for lack of a better term). How do we get a real picture of ourselves? On place is obviously scripture. It can mirror back to us who we are. The image that I get reflected back to me is one that is a mixture of dignity and depravity, or like someone said, a glorious ruin. You are right T, there is a paradox there.

Another great place to get this realistic picture of ourselves is through other people. Unfortunately, this does not usually happen in everyday interactions. I think we have to be intentional about it by asking a simple question to those people we are close to: What is it like to be in a classroom with me? What is it like to be my friend? What is it like to be my wife? Whoa. I think it takes a lot of courage to do this and leave it totally open ended, not trying to lead the response in any direction. Maybe even ask the question and let them have a couple days to think about it.

I have to be honest, I have not done this in a long time. I would be scared to think what Erica would say. We all should try it sometime.

Thanks for bringing this issue up T. Self knowledge that is accurate is a big problem. I think that many of the great people in history have dealt with it.

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