101 Ways to Kill Spike, R-Rated -- BAPS back-up

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Subject: 101 Ways to Kill Spike, R-Rated

Author:
HardCase

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Date Posted: 06:04:02 03/16/02 Sat

Disclaimer: Spike belongs to Joss and ME. But only if they can find him and take him away from us.

*********************************
101 Ways to Kill Spike

Spoil him to death. Starting with hot chocolate and baby marshmallows.

Kill him with kindness.

Choke him with love.

Wrap your arms around him and squeeze him to death.

Rub him out. One rub at a time.

Finish him off. But only after he's finished you first.

Set him on fire. With passion.

Drown him. In LUURRVVE.

Dust him�with powdered sugar. Lick him to death.

Stake him, but only after he can't stake you any more.

Put one naked Spike in a room. Add 100 randomly chosen women. Pile on.

Eat him alive. Repeat.

Turn head-hunter and hunt him down and get some head.

Turn head-hunter and hunt him down and give some head.

Play horsey and ride him at a gallop until his legs buckle and his eyes roll up. Squeeze him until he pops like warm champagne, and begs you to hurt him just a little bit more.

Thrill him till it kills him.

Send him to Glory. No, wait. She can't have him.

Send him to Kingdom come and come and come and come and�

Polish him off. Use body oil of your own choosing. Repeat until desired luster is achieved.

Do him in. Then do him again. And again. And again. And again�

Wipe him out. Vary body part used for wiping.

Put him out of his misery. Therefore be happy when he's in you.

Do him in. Then do him outside. Then do him under. Then do him on top. Then do him side by side.

Bump him off. Continuing bumping until he gets off again.

Lay him low. Then lay him on bed.

Silence him. With kisses.

Smother him. With kisses.

Blow his brains out. You know where men keep their brains? Blow again.

Make him a stiff. Relieve. Repeat until stiffness no longer returns.

Bite the big one. But gently.

Put him on a leash. Teach him to come.

Chain him spread-eagle to a bed. Cut his clothes off. Take a peacock feather and tickle him to death.

Chain him spread-eagle to a bed. Satin sheets. Cut his clothes off. Boink him to death.

***************
Note: Just a minute. Cold Shower.

Please let me know of any other diabolical ways you'd like to kill Spike and I will add them to "101 Ways to Kill Spike".

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Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
Re: 101 Ways to Kill Spike, R-Rated	Chuckg	06:17:30 03/16/02 Sat

Re: 101 Ways to Kill Spike, R-Rated	JodithGrace	07:02:04 03/16/02 Sat