| Subject: The truth amoung the lies |
Author:
Lily
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Date Posted: 17:12:11 04/19/02 Fri
Three days had passed since she'd read the letter.
Three days had passed and now the immensence saddness was just a dull ache.
Three days had passed and she had not uttered a word to anyone but Rosie, and then only to thank her after meal times, where she ate little.
Concerned looks followed her, but they were ingored.
Frodo was not her father: nothing mattered.
Her pristine bedroom was still pristine but this no longer registered, as Lily sat and stared with unseeing eyes at the door. Although she did not admit it to even herself she was waiting for one of her parents to walk through it, Frodo, not some man she had never met.
I am the daughter of Frodo Baggins she thought quietly, but the fire that had filled her before when Sam had questioned her about her father was gone. She no longer believed it. She had grown up and it was time to stop believing in faeries.
Three days had passed and the unread letter on her bedside table called to her, don't you want to know who your father is?
"No!" she shouted and in ran Sam.
He looked at the somber girl with red eyes and then meaningfully at the letter. Sam was, of course, too polite to read it himself but Lily could see the conflict that was raised within him. On one hand, it was really none of his business, on the other: here was a lost child in need of a father and if their was one thing that he was good at, it was this.
Faining bravery that she did not feel, Lily picked up the object that had caused her so much pain with only one line Frodo is not your father. She had not more tears left so none fell down her face, though many in her heart.
The truth is, as you may have guessed, that Frodo is not your father, at least not by birth. In everyway that matters he was a father to you.
But I can see that that does not mean anything to you. Blood is thicker that fireside stories and forehead kisses while you slept.
You know the man who is your biological father but I made sure that neither you nor Frodo ever found out. You would've been heart broken and I did not want to sully his gentle soul with the consquences of the resulting anger.
Anger? At what? you may ask and rightly.
This is the bit that I hoped would never see light.
I suppose it starts with one simple fact:
While I adored Frodo Baggins with all the fibres of my being, he could only bring himself to be fond of me.
As time passed this has changed but it was the case 20 years ago.
Then one night, during a birthday party, I went to Frodo and I asked him if he loved me. He did not lie and the pity in his eyes crushed my spirt: suddenley life was meaningless to me.
Fleeing from Frodo and the anguish in his voice [for we were friends, even if he did not love me] I ran.
With sobs wracking my body I lay under a tree heartbroken, and that is when he came to me, plying me with drink until I was senseless enough to admit to my spurned love and seek his consolation. Then it happened...
Of course you were born 9 months later and I moved to Bree to excape from the accusing gazes and taunts that were thrown at an unwed mother.
Naturally Frodo blamed himself and offered to accompany me, but I could not do that to him.
So Mr. Baggins stayed in the Shire while Bluebell Goodbody and her illigitamate daughter moved away.
Frodo visited every month and eventually adopted you. Then one day when you were 4, playing at our feet, he uttered the words I have waited a lifetime to hear, "I love you."
Suddenley I had all I had ever wanted but it was fragile, so fragile that I feared the truth would shatter it.]
So I never told Frodo about the man who moved to Bree with us, lurking just out of sight.
Bill Ferny.
Please don't remember me in hate for being weak or Frodo for not being what you believed him to be.
We both loved you so much.
I just wish I could be there to watch you finish growing up but it seems that even that will be reft from me.
All my love, Mum
So there it was. That was the truth amoung the lies.
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