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Date Posted: 06:31:25 08/12/02 Mon
Author: Jeanne
Subject: Grammar

Well written, but this really grates:

A LONE FIGURE leans against the railing on the platform above the dance floor of the Bronze. We do not see the figure's face or learn of

'their'

(their? That's plural, and "a long figure" is singular. Should be "his" or "her" or "its.")

identity, although we do see parts of

'their'

entirely black attire, as

'they'

peer down at the table at which BUFFY sits.


I don't care for script form, but this is well done, other than the misused plural, which is repeated throughout the script. If you can correct that, it would certainly help the overall effect.

I will continue reading.

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