Open Invitational Ladder Match -- Have your say about anything, quite literally!

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Date Posted: 14:00:10 04/22/06 Sat
Author: Razor Shark
Subject: Open Invitational Ladder Match

So, after many years of Errgentlemen, it all ends this Sunday, with an open invitational ladder match for the biggest prize of them all, the Errgentlemen Heavyweight Championship. I bet you�re all crying and moaning that you won�t have a place to practice your �skills� when this is gone, aren�t you?

But you see, few of you have realised exactly what this means. You all assume that The Poison will retain his gold, or maybe that Steam will win the title again, or that one of your other precious little stars will go out on top of the business. Let me tell you this: you are all gravely mistaken!

Why? Well, since this is an OPEN invitational, it means anyone can enter. No, the big news of this match won�t be a Poison title defence, and it won�t be a �deserving� man on the roster winning the Heavyweight Championship� the big story will be the return of website entertainment�s most diabolical, calculating and maniacal superstar to ever grace it with it�s presence� myself, Razor Shark!

Of course, most of you won�t have heard of me. People like me aren�t the kind to parade themselves around the world wide web, trying to get involved in every little slice of wrestling the Internet has to offer. No� the reason you won�t have heard of Razor Shark, is because he has a track record of joining a website entertainment organisation, winning their top title, defeating EVERYONE who dares to step into his line of fire, and dominating to such an extent that the other so-called �superstars� leave because they�re too scared of being savagely beaten and humiliated by me AGAIN! I destroy people, I destroy Championships, and I destroy whole federations of wrestlers who are foolish enough to think that they stand a chance against me! By the time I�m through with a federation, there�s nobody stupid enough to dare mention me anywhere else, because they know I�d smell out their fear and their blood, and not rest until they had been ripped to shreds! The same will happen to Errgentlemen, and every other organisation I become a part of in the future.

You�re probably asking yourself, �why Errgentlemen?�. I�ll tell you exactly why, peons! My brother is competing in this match, and he told me all about Errgentlemen, it�s Championship and the likely competitors. And did I sit there and think �here�s a nice chance for me to help my brother out�? No way. You see, I may be a little biased towards my family, but there are some things in life that are more important than family. Those things are gold, success, and ANNIHILATING other human beings! So brother, if I have to end you in order to win the Errgentlemen Heavyweight Championship, know this: I�ll do just that!

Why? Because I, Razor Shark, am not interesting in allegiances, or friends, or helping out others. I�d rather my brother win than any of you other sub par �superstar� hacks, but that�s not even going to enter the equation, because I will climb that ladder, and I will become the Errgentlemen Heavyweight Champion! Whether it�s by my incomparable speed, my crippling and bone-breaking technique, my relentless power, my thirst to make everybody in that ring bleed, or just because I am simply far better than all of you, I am going to become the last ever Errgentlemen Heavyweight Champion, and there is NOTHING you can do about it!

You�d better get yourself some private health care ready for this Sunday, because the NHS won�t have the facilities to deal with the kind of injuries I am going to administer to every single one of you who�s stupid enough to enter the match. My family motto is �make your actions felt�, and after the invitational ladder match, you are all going to realise that actions do indeed speak louder than words! And, for the amount I�ve said just now, you should all be approaching the match with a sense of dread and fear. Be prepared, because nothing will stop me from tearing you and your organisation apart in its eleventh hour, and becoming the Errgentlemen Heavyweight Champion!

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