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Date Posted: 14:55:05 12/04/02 Wed
Author: sebastian francis
Subject: More jolly japes

Here's ten of mine (again in no particular order)
1. Miss Yates's art lessons in year 9- particularly the time when we had to make something out of items such as bottle tops/twigs etc. Most people's offerings were pretty lame, except for Dave Roper's, a 5-6 inch high figurine of a man with a sherlock holmes hat and a cape standing proud, one hand on hip, wanking. Attention to detail was incredible- kidney bean cock, dried pea bollocks, sawdust pubes and a line of white pva glue emanating from the crown.

2. Walking into Mr. Newman's lesson whilst it was in progress, having heard rumours that you really could say anything to him- realising this was true when he responded to "sir; Spoon. Pencil case." with "Breaktime Breaktime"

3. Can't remeber what year it was, but that choir service rehearsal with the anonymous governor/guest speaker/fuck knows who that went up to the podium, belched, and left again.

4. Assembly one morning with a lad who went up at the front to play a piece on his trumpet, blew one toot to ready himself, and was met with rapturous applause.

5. Sitting next to John Bray in every exam from GCSE's onwards, and trying not to fall off my chair when he got stuck on a question, lost his temper and started saying 'FUCK' in a loud monotone.

6. Year 12 biology field trip- always mentioned because of the brown sauce incident, but was a riot from start to finish. Points to note include Dan Lewis nicking gregory's ancient leather jacket, putting it on and ripping it, Dan Lewis borrowing a copy of an FHM calendar from Johnny Morris, masturbating over it (literally) and givng it back, Mike Weavers asking the women in charge of the place how often she 'bashes her buckthorn' and Ben Fawcett in general.

7. IT with Chas Hubbard. If I was at the front getting a bollocking he would literally shout err gentlemen, look at his face, don't laugh at his moustache etc. Then he'd do exactly the same if he was at the front and I was sitting down. Me and chas were the only two people entered for the lower tier exam in our set. On the exam itself, I was accidentally given the higher tier paper, simon allen was given mine. I got a B, he got a C. Unlucky Si.

8. GCSE physics with Dr. Everett- Olly fletcher sat on the second row directly behind Marcus elliot. As the lesson wore on, Olly would begin to say "shut up. SHUT UP." increasingly loudly until Everett would snap and bollock marcus.

9. REjoice REjoice, Tim Maaaaaanuel will come to the oh iiisrael.

10. Miss Bieber arriving in a lesson with a new haircut, and being met with a few low key wolf whistles and comments from the class, and one very loud "GOT A STIFFY" from Andy Brown.

go to this address http://pharcide.com/prodigytech/hello.html, and try not to think of johnny pembridge

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