Have To Love Myself Much More -- Waterfalls and Dreams- a Poetry Place

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Date Posted: 16:34:27 03/21/01 Wed
Author: Brian Beaudry
Author Host/IP: NoHost / 142.217.115.34
Subject: Have To Love Myself Much More

Child abuse is the most hideous of crimes, and when its perpetrated by a parent, the one they trust more than any other, where can they go for help? In writing this piece I put myself in the mind of the victim, but can't truly comprehend their pain for only one that has experienced it knows the depths of suffering they are forced to endure. I do hope it makes people more aware of its existence and join in protest of this deplorable injustice inflicted on some of our youth. At the same time, give the victims reassurance that they are not to blame, and can seek help. Guidance councilors, friends, people you trust can give the support and help you need, reach out for that help, embrace it, know there are those who care !!

I Have To Love Myself Much More

Sitting on the corner of my large four-poster bed
Silently I mourn as my hands support my head
What could be the reason to have me in such strife
I have always had most anything in my 12 years of life
Truly this is the cause of all my sorrow and dismay
Gifts in great abundance, dad, at my feet would lay
To ply my young favors and to keep the truth from sight
I know in my heart and in God's eyes this wasn't right
But he's my father and he said I must obey
He deeply truly loves me, I would hear him say
As he lay down beside me, my innocence to take
All the while I prayed, from this nightmare please to wake
And after he'd leave me, bleeding and in pain
I'd pray for forgiveness, thinking it was I that was to blame
For how could my father do something that's so wrong
He's always been so righteous, and in religion very strong
Why must I suffer this, God how did it begin
And how can I stop it, he will never let me win
Each time that I tell him, in God's eyes this is wrong
He tells me he loves me and that to him I belong
So please God give me the strength to put this to an end
No matter what his punishment, my soul I must defend
For I can't take the shame and the horrors anymore
For even if I love him, I have to love myself much more.

� 2001 Brian Beaudry

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