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Date Posted: 07:46:51 03/19/07 Mon
Author: Mr Stacey, a fine drillsman and habitual scrote. (hey, hey, hey I'm the fonz.)
Subject: Re: Farting on Cakes
In reply to: B.M. Pott 's message, "Farting on Cakes" on 18:30:43 11/11/06 Sat

>TRUE STORY Hi, my name is confidential and I'm about
>to disclose to you a very discrete matter between my
>girlfriend and I, which I would readily like to share
>with you. But first, let me introduce to you my
>breath-taking girlfriend Kris. She's 19 y/o, tall,
>blond-haired, blue-eyed, a shiny smile of kindness. As
>to the physical aspects, she's very attractive, having
>lush tits, curved shaped-up luscious ample ass. As a
>daughter of a G.I. Lieutenant-Colonel of Norwegian
>extraction, and a German nurse, she looks very
>"Nordic", very alike to a typical Scandinavian. She
>works at a well-known esteem restaurant in New York
>City and used to work at "7-Eleven" in Chevron gas
>station down in Pennsylvania. Well, for couple of
>years she's been having a bizarre habit/hobby, -
>farting on cream cakes... (beats me) It's amazing to
>see her taking off her pants, exposing her bare butt
>before me, then bending over, squatting with it to the
>cake, and vigorously breaking winds all over it. It's
>so weird! Once I decided to get down to it and asked
>her as to the meaning of this bizarre fetish, so she
>told me that it has turned her on since being a little
>girl. Beats me! She can hardly even explain it to
>herself! So one day while I was visiting her at the
>restaurant, she approached me, took a cake out of the
>fridge, got undressed and carried out her constant
>ritual. I got suddenly so turned on, that my prick
>thought of punching my stretched pants, so I took 'em
>off. Astonished and grateful, I stared at my lover
>performing the ceremony easily and slowly, thanking
>Jesus Lord for her beauty. She bent down to place her
>ass in front of the cake, while I'm standing in the
>corner watching her drawing near her slit and sh*thole
>to approximately 2-3 inches from the cake, waiting
>patiently for the digestion gases to accumulate, then
>be thrust out of her body to meet the benign cake. She
>told me she'd had the beans, so she was equipped with
>a lot of farts just to be proud of. After she let out
>a silent one, felt only due to its odor, she broke
>winds loudly, about 5 or 6 in a row, every one of them
>sounded like a canon bombardment, or at least - a
>starting motorcycle. The last one lasted 7 whole
>seconds. I think she passed gas at 500 ml bulk sum
>total. Initially the smell was hot, strong and
>condensed as the molecules were too dense. After a
>while when it began to spread, it has become sharp,
>punctual and less offensive. After about 20 seconds it
>felt all over the room, surprisingly turning me on.
>She raised from the bending position, getting up on
>her feet. As for the cake- after a few minutes it was
>a total mess, looked full of fungi and all sorts of
>bacteria and sour, still carrying Kris' wonderful
>smell. Couple of minutes later a good looking young
>fella entered the restaurant and asked for a pie. Kris
>served him the foul smelling cake. He ate it
>unabruptly, unaware of the drama which had taken place
>just before. I was watching the scene while it was
>going on, I couldn't hold it in, and rushed to the
>staff's bathroom, bursting out laughing, lying on the
>floor twisting, until my belly was sore. 10 minutes
>later, after recovering from the wild laughter, I went
>out of the facility just to encounter the funny guy
>holding his stomach, with a tormented expression on
>his face, speeding all the way to get rid of the foul
>cake. I think he's just had at least 150 million
>germs... Bon appetite! [GeekMaster: Karl AKA "The Cake
>fart Man"]

Qite clearly that girl needs some anti-acids.

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