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Date Posted: 04:07:48 02/17/04 Tue
Author: No name
Subject: Salvation
In reply to: united prayer 's message, "TESTIMONY FROM OTHER BELIEVERS IN CHRIST" on 06:14:42 07/23/02 Tue

I was a "Functional alcoholic" Most people didn't know I drank and those who did , Had NO Idea how much I drank, By 'functional'I mean it never interfered with my work, I took ephedra all day so I never appeared drunk and thanks to watermelon bubblegum , I never smelled drunk, I worked 80 hours a week for almost 20 years, and I never stopped drinking in all that time , I got up every morning drank a pot of coffee and chased it with a 12 pack before I left for work, and I worked circles around everyone,although I found opportunity to drink on the job as well, I was never without a job because I was dependable, hardworking and willing to work all the time, I filled my life with work work work , and Booze was the anesthetic for all my pain!
But then one day I had to quit work and take care of 3 family members who were helpless and I lost my identity, I didn't know who I was if I wasn't the hard working gal who everyone depended on in a crisis, I wasn't where I wanted to be , I knew I couldn't escape this responsibility BUT I didn't want to do it , so I drank even more as I took care of my family, and after a couple of years it finally took its toll...I was dying and I knew it , whats more I didn't care" you see I had been in so much pain for so long and I just wanted to die, I was in constant physical pain, I had lost my beauty, I was bloated and suffering from insomnia that no ammount of booze could give me rest from, I hadn't slept in 3 months and I was begging God to let me die, then in June '92' I lay in bed trying to will my heart to stop beating and my lungs to stop breathing , when I called out to God sincerely ...I said 'God , if you are there and you are truly and God of compassion , if you really are kind, then you will just let me die and end this pain and despair please have mercy and let me die!"and a funny thing happened...I fell asleep , for the first time in months I slept like a baby, but when I awoke the pain was still there , and the despair was worse than ever, I had to get up to look after my helpless family members and I just didn't know how I could move, I got up , leaned over put my face in my hands and said Lord I don't know How I can make it through another day, I just can't.
I then drug myself to the bathroom, and i believe I would have died of despair right then ..,.BUT, as I fell over into the sink to splash water on my swollen bloated face, I literally heard a whisper calling my name, I stood up and looked around to see who was there ( noone ) then once again I heard my name whispered and " its time...take a look" frightened I raised my head and looked in the mirror, what I saw terrified me, I saw myself ( the sinner) I saw a wasted life , I have never been so sick, I ran back to my room and locked the door, but that feeling and that person ( Holy Spirit) followed me, I remember backing away from the door 2 , 3 , 4 , steps backward and then I fell upon my knees, and that is when God answered my prayer, he let me Die! I died to myself but when I rose up I was alive in Christ! Praise God , I stood up and I was a new creature in Christ Jesus.
Now I had not been able to stop drinking for 20 years, but after that moment I never touched another drink, I was dying from liver disease But I stood up healed ...In on month I lost 60 lbs of fluid that had me bloated and in pain!
And I am here as a living testimony that God Saves -Heals - and Delivers!!!
I have never looked back , and I thank God that who the Son sets free is free indeed, I have had a rough and rocky road in the last 11 years but jesus has held me tight and given me strength to bear every burden and I have never been alone in any trial, I know that I know that He is coming back so very soon and I don't want anyone to miss Him on that day! I give God praise and thanks for saving me ...for healing me...for delivering me....and for restoring me , not to what I was but to better than I ever dreamed I could be!!
Thank you Jesus, thank you Lord ...My King.. My Sovriegn..My Savior...My Father...My all in all!!!

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