| Subject: Re: online texas holdem poker - Overcoming addictions |
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JW (JW)
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Date Posted: 12:08:20 09/24/06 Sun
In reply to:
online texas holdem poker
's message, "online texas holdem poker" on 16:03:46 05/03/05 Tue
OVERCOMING ADDICTIONS
TEXT: ROMANS 7:14-24, “For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin. 15 For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I. 16 If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good. 17 Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. 18 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. 19 For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. 20 Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. 21 I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me. 22 For I delight in the law of God after the inward man: 23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. 24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?”
Addiction to sin is as old as the human race.
As soon as Adam and Eve fell into sin, they plunged all of humanity into an addictive pattern. Today, addiction is so widespread that over 30% of all Americans are being treated for some form of addiction: drug and alcohol abuse, gambling, pornography, sexual addictions, etc. The list is almost endless.
Every level of society is affected: married and single, young and old alike. USA Today recently noted that unless we can quickly stem the tide of increased cigarette use in adolescents, all the reductions in lung and heart disease will be reversed in this decade. In a compulsive culture, these trends can only increase. Any time a society sanctions taking your grocery change in an addictive substance (I speak of lottery gambling), an epidemic is in the making.
ALARMING FACTS
Multiplied millions of children now use the Internet regularly and many are being hooked on Internet pornography. There are computer bulletin boards set up specifically for the seduction of children. They lure kids in with games and establish relationships with them on-line. Then they arrange to meet face-to-face. Child molesters are using the electronic superhighway to look for victims. They are going to the places where 21st century kids play. Illegal, hard-core pornography includes bestiality (sex with animals), incest, rape, sado-masochism, torture, mutilation, necrophilia (Sex with the dead!) and “eroticized” urination and defecation. Most of the victims of such degrading themes are WOMEN and CHILDREN and are depicted on the net!
One in three American girls and one in seven boys will be sexually molested by age 18.
87% of the convicted molesters of girls and 77% of the convicted molesters of boys admit that the use of pornography played a role in the commission of their crimes.
A primary consumer group of pornography is adolescent boys 12 - 17.
There are now many more hard-core pornography outlets in America than there are McDonald’s restaurants!
Eighty-six percent (86%) of convicted rapists admit to regular pornography use.
The pornography industry grosses $10 - $20 billion per year and is primarily controlled by organized crime.
WHAT CAUSES ADDICTIONS?
Addicts seek to escape painful emotions through addictive substances and addictive behaviors.
They seek to create an artificial high, calm their stress, or create illusions that symbolize love and nurture.
Addicts want instant relief from their pain.
They want pleasure without responsibility and consequences.
This is the problem of our sinful nature. Ever since Adam and Eve sinned against God, people have been dealing with the consequences of sin - sickness, pain and death.
(1) Addictions are diseases of unhealthy survival.
Addicts think that they are in control and that their addictions help them survive painful experiences. Whatever the substance or behavior, it seems to addicts like a friend that brings temporary relief from loneliness, anger, and fear. Counselors and ministers need to realize that giving up these addictions may seem life- threatening to addicts.
Attempts to get them to change may be met with great anger.
This is like trying to take food away from a hungry animal.
Family, friends and counselors will hear denial, lies, excuses, and see many short-lived attempts to give up the addiction.
They will be blamed, criticized, and even sued by angry addicts who feel threatened. Be prepared not to take this personally. This anger and denial is not about you. It is about the addict’s shame and desperation.
Focus on these feelings as a way of helping addicts give up control and reach out for help.
The addict must be willing to replace short-term gratification with long-term peace.
Addicts need to learn that they can exchange short-term unhealthy survival strategies - the high of their addictions - for long-term healing strategies.
Addicts need the fellowship of others who struggle with similar addictions.
They will also need to learn healthy emotional, physical, and spiritual discipline. This is a life-long process.
(2) Addictions are choices of the will.
At some point in life, the addict makes a conscious choice to sin by taking a chance on addictive substances or behaviors.
Nobody made you start smoking, drinking, or taking drugs. You made that choice and you must decide to do something about it.
You may need help and most addicts do - that is why we established Elim Home for drug and alcohol abuse - to provide a spiritual environment in which to minister to addicts and help them find God’s power to change.
Support and accountability groups are essential.
Eventually, however, we must also search for and treat underlying causes. Often addicts will be depressed, anxious, and obsessive-compulsive.
Actually “dry drunks” - alcoholics who have found sobriety but who still suffer from deep inner conflicts. Many addicts may even be suicidal.
Various forms of in-patient hospitalization may be necessary. But ultimately, the addict has to want to quit. He or she must decide: “I’ve had enough! I want out!”
(3) Addictions are spiritual substitutes.
In their addiction, addicts are looking for love, nurture, and relationship (even if only with a bottle, pill, food, work or sex).
Some counselors see addicts as searching for a relationship with God. Addicts have sought religious solutions for years.
THE NEED FOR CHANGE
As Christians we are in the business of helping people change by introducing them to the grace of God and the power of the gospel.
BARRIERS TO CHANGE
(1) Lack of motivation. “I want to change, but I’m too busy to get help”.
(2) Resistance. “I can’t” usually means “I won’t”.
(3) Labels and Excuses. “We’re all addicts aren’t we?” “Shopaholic, workaholic, chocaholic, caffeine addict! So, leave me alone!”
(4) Self-sufficiency. “I have the power within me to beat this. I don’t need God”.
(5) It’s all in my genes. “I have a genetic predisposition to alcohol, homosexuality, pornography or whatever”.
(6) Poor self-worth. I’m so worthless I really don’t matter, so I might as well go ahead and indulge in my addiction. This is the belief one is so ugly, fat, or stupid that things can’t get any worse. It is the idea that “no one cares what happens to me, so why should I?”
I can’t face myself, can’t stand the guilt, so I have to have my habit to enable me to tolerate
myself. Maybe I can cut down. Then I won’t have to quit. This is an effort to do anything to hang on to the addiction!
GROUND RULES FOR CHANGE
Ground Rule #1: Never believe what an addict says. All addicts are liars. They lie the most to themselves and to those they love the most.
Ground Rule #2: Sobriety and Abstinence are the Primary Objectives. Addiction is a mood-altering experience. Only when he or she is “clean” does an addict have the ability to think clearly, to make appropriate choices, and to follow through on decisions.
Ground Rule #3: Obtaining Sobriety Requires Help. Getting help is mandatory. Going sober solo generates new compulsions. While they might be less deadly or more socially acceptable, they are compulsive behaviors, nonetheless.
Ground Rule #4: Addicts Mimimize the Seriousness of Their Addictions. Addicts always discount the severity of their addictions and hold back from doing everything necessary to develop and maintain sobriety.
Ground Rule #5: Addiction and Sobriety Are Processes. While conversion is instantaneous, a new lifestyle is not always as sudden. Relapse is possible and the addict needs a safe place to start over and safe people to be with (Elim Home).
Ground Rule #6: Victory Requires Patience and Leverage. Addicts are better at maintaining their addiction than we are at solving them. They will beat us every time.
Ground Rule #7: Addictions Are Forms of Self-Medication. Addictions sedate emotional pain, quiet anxiety, and provide a false sense of well being. Abstinence allows the underlying issues, with all their pent-up emotions, to surface and be processed in counseling.
Ground Rule #8: The Addiction Affects All Of The Addict’s Contacts. Spouses, families, and co-workers become tied into the maintenance of addictions and must be involved in the treatment process as well. Their lack of involvement places the sobriety process at risk of sabotage.
Ground Rule #9: Victory Comes Only When the Addict Truly Wants Deliverance. Addicts can develop a history of treatment programs, counseling, or broken relationships. We cannot work harder at sobriety than the addict does. They must come to grips with their own addiction and deny it.
Ground Rule #10: Only God Can Set You Free. In Romans 7:24-25, Paul admitted that the power of sin is so great that sometimes we give into the very things we are determined to resist. Speaking on behalf of all of us, he said:
“O, wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me from the body of this death? I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord.”
Jesus alone is the answer to our addictions. He took all our sins upon Himself on the cross and died for each one of them.
Romans 8:1 says: “There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus.”
Galatians 2:20, “I am crucified with Christ; nevertheless, I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”
Stop denying your addiction. Stop excusing yourself. Face it and deal with it. Confess it to God. Repent of it. Turn away from it and turn your life over to Christ right now.
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