Re: post plans? -- Snives Reunion Thingie

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Date Posted: 08:09:44 09/20/02 Fri
Author: Matthew Koorey
Subject: Re: post plans?
In reply to: Liam Brennan 's message, "Re: post plans?" on 06:40:15 09/09/02 Mon

>By the way, does any one know what happened to Tanya
>Blanoe (the Olympics girl)?

Tanya Blancoe's last professional arrangement was with SOCOG doing those ads encouraging us all to buy Olympic tickets (or at least be put in a ballot to get backrow seats at a Portugal vs Bahrain table tennis match). She read the news on Roy and H.G's "The Dream" during the Olympic period. Her success in the television arena led her to seek other, more ambitious projects.

Eager to shrug off her image as "the Olympics girl" (and partially angered by Nikki Webster's assumption of the role of "the thirteen-year-old Olympics girl") she did a nude spread in U.S. men's magazine "Swank" but it was her line in Sydney's 1993 bid speech "In Australia we all live together, eat together and SLEEP together ..." that won her a role as "Girl #1473" in "Gangbang 2000: Head Downunder".

After a failed marriage to the Mitsubishi kid, AKA Arthur from "Hey Dad", previously only famous for telling St Ives North's class of 1993 to "F*** off" at the Powerhouse museum, she briefly joined with fellow freaks to form a superhero team known as "Mutant X" until they were sued by Marvel Comics for copyright violation.

Stripped of her superpowers after exposure to kryptonite, she proposed to Hollywood's latest rebound-boy, Justin Timberlake. Justin, who at the 2001 People's Choice Awards had accused her of smoking marijuana and sleeping with actor Matthew McConaughey, still refuses to retract these statements though he says the stuff about the breast implants is "just crap." The pair publicly state they have set a wedding date for April next year, though actually wed secretly in the Seychelles earlier this month.

Britney Spears, who recently made headlines after suing New Line Cinema for referring to her as "Mr Spears" (everyone knows she received her PhD from Stanford University last year and should now be referred to only as "Dr Spears") in the credits of "Austin Powers: Goldmember", said of the couple "I hope they're happy" though is reported to have told a Mexican woman outside a Wal-Mart in Idaho, "They can get fucked. That's right, I say "Fuck". And I drink and smoke and I fucked Matthew McConaughey first! I mean, she can't even dance! And yes, this is a fucking Coca-Cola! Fuck! It just tastes better, OK?! Where's my whole fucking entourage? Get the fucking car!"

While her directorial efforts on "Moulin Rouge" were overlooked at last year's Academy Awards, her performance in the upcoming "Lord of the Rings" sequel, "The Two Towers" is already generating considerable Oscar buzz, three months before the films official release.

While she accepts that the public will always see her as "the Tanya we know", a construct of the media and the fast food industry, she says she wants to "spend time getting to know the Tanya I know" and so has decided to gracefully fade from the public eye for a few years. She has a few projects that should help her get back into the limelight though once her sabbatical is over, including the "Bowral: 2016" bid. Kevan Gosper has already promised her first leg in the torch relay.

If all else fails, she'll just rob a 7-11.

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Replies:

Re: post plans? -- Liam Brennan, 03:05:58 09/22/02 Sun