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Subject: A terrible story Author: Kim (sad) [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 08:51:37 11/30/07 Fri I had let my boyfriend convince me 5 years ago to have an abortion. We were young, 19 and 20, and he wasnt ready to be a father, and I dont think I was ready to be a mother. Anyway, I went to the clinic and used the "pill" method of termination which was still fairly new then. They said I was exactly 9 weeks. The doctor at the clinic told me that after inserting the pills into my body in 24 hours I would get my period, and that I wouldnt notice the actual passing of the fetus. Well 24 hours later I inserted the pills and waited. I had horrible cramping and only a little bleeding. 8 hours later I went to go to the bathroom, and when I sat down I felt something come out. When I looked there was a fully intact fetus, in a clear sac about the size of a half dollar, connected to the umbillical cord and a fully intact placenta attched to that. I could see its features, fingers and toes... I was mortified and I can still see that image as clear as day. When I told the clinic they said they had only heard of that happening 1 other time and that they were sorry. SORRY!!!! I feel horrible still now and have a hard time. Things trigger my sadness, a preg coworker, a preg friend, babies on TV, every Nov, because that is when I concieved, and every Jan, because that is when I aborted. Please give me some advice. I never wanted to do it, but I did. Now I want to have a baby, my husband isnt ready, but since my coworker just found out she is, I keep thinking that it should be me, because I want to be, and of course because it is Nov. I am not religous, but I still feel like I am being punished. Help!! [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Subject: Re: A terrible story Author: Kris [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 22:42:00 11/30/07 Fri Dear Kim, I am so sorry for your loss. What a traumatic experience that must have been. I'm glad you posted here and I want to encourage you and say that it took a lot of courage to just write down what you did. Wanting to heal and move on emotionally is very important. This site can be a little quiet - but here is another one for you to check out: www.safehavenminitries.com You can also visit this site: http://www.optionline.org/hadabortion.html Many of the centers affiliated with that site offer FREE post-abortion counseling, something you really should seek out. Finding a way to heal completely would be very important before you start a family. Hugs, Kris

[> Subject: Re: A terrible story Author: Anonymous [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 23:07:20 01/14/08 Mon Just know that you are not alone, I too have flashbacks and am mortified. If you wish to talk, feel free to. I can't solve what your feeling, but I can try to go through it with you.