| Subject: Re: We ARE this place |
Author:
Deidra
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Date Posted: 01:14:06 06/27/01 Wed
In reply to:
Cassie
's message, "We ARE this place" on 22:34:39 06/26/01 Tue
A rumor that I am developing a new way of teaching dharma? I don't know anything about this!! Where did it come from? What I am doing is studying the HSS to learn to assist. But what is here to learn is emmence. I know well those things I had to know to awaken. So much more lies ahead for me, to really be able to help teach this. In fact until about an hour ago, I was really feeling something like, who in the hell do I think I am to think I am going to be able to do this at all? But an hour ago I went into a huge processing episode. The kind that you have to lie on the bed to do . Ted's picture in hand, I went into core issue: " I will be found out to be bad" This was among other things, provoked by hearing on a HSS tape that when we gaze, Saniel said, we get brought up in us the way we tend to feel in relation to others and the world. And for me I think one thing that comes up is the fear that I will be found to be bad. Just look at me a little longer and you will see it. And I saw that in my life, that sometimes when I write an e-mail, for instance, and don't hear back right away, I figure out how the other person might have taken it wrongly and then be angry with me. And I can get thrown so deeply into an aberated exageration and distortion, that I saw that I believed some how that if they decided that I was bad, and am bad, that that actually made it so! This is broken soul stuff for sure. I found myself saying over and over, that someone else thinking I did something bad, or thinking I am bad does not make it so!!! Somehow I got from there to : And yes I can learn to help teach this work. And yes I do love people and can help others to awaken! There is nothing wrong with me. Yes there are far greater minds in this work, and I don,t think anyone will ever be able to do it like Saniel can. But of course he is the genius that originated this work. And I don't know where my final place of help will be, but I am good, and I am able to help in what ever capacity I am able to. So that's whats up for me. I am mentoring one person and it is a great blessing to do so. I am so in Love with this work and sitting on the porch with you. This is a great service and invitation to all of us that is such a gift Cassie, Thanks and LOve to you. Deidra
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