Here's mine! -- Godawful Fan Fiction

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Date Posted: Sun, Apr 25 2004, 5:37:34
Author: Mysterious_Creature
Subject: Here's mine!
In reply to: Sil 's message, "My turn!" on Fri, Apr 23 2004, 0:29:47

Stinky Bob and Hairy Sack were eating lunch at a deli near their office when the door swung open. With a jingle of the bell above the door, a nasty woman entered the restaurant, bringing with her a farty gust of wind that smelled of rancid ass.

Hairy Sack gasped. "Mary!" he exclaimed. "Is it really you? It's been so long!"

"Hairy Sack!" the woman hurried over to their table. Hairy Sack rose to meet her, and she hugged him, resting her stinky head on his slimy cock for a moment. "2 years, Hairy Sack," she murmured, her voice flowing over his ears like cock. "I can't believe I'm seeing you again!"

Stinky Bob cleared his throat. "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friend, Hairy Sack?"

"Oh, of course," Hairy Sack said over. "Mary, this is my partner Stinky Bob. Stinky Bob, this is my grandma Mary Sue."

"It's a pleasure to meet you," Stinky Bob said, taking her stinky ass in his. "Won't you join us for lunch?" Stinky Bob wanted to be jealous of Mary's closeness to his Hairy Sack, but he couldn't resist the allure of the raunchy pussy that shone from her purple eyes.

Mary ordered a floppy donkey dick sandwich, and the three talked over lunch. Stinky Bob was very impressed by Mary's tiny, tight asshole, and huge face hole. Suddenly, Mary pushed her sandwich aside and looked at them seriously.

"Hairy Sack, Stinky Bob," she said, "I came to Sueage for a purpose. I had a gassy psychic vision that warned me to come here. I have a very smelly task to complete."

Hairy Sack reached across the table and patted Mary's nipples. "How can we help you?" he said.

"You don't have to do anything," she said. "Just listen to what I say, and do as I ask."

Before either Stinky Bob or Hairy Sack could reply, the door flew open and 2.5 masked men ran into the deli. Shouting, "My name is Inigo Montoya! You killed my father! Prepare to die!", one of them launched himself towards Stinky Bob, brandishing a huge chubby.

Just before the puckery assface plunged into Stinky Bob's asshole, Mary flung herself across the table, protecting him with her body. Bright yellow blood started squirting from her nipples, covering her crotchless panties with jello.

Horrified at the senseless waste of such a moldy and rotten ass, the masked men, who were insane Mandy Patinkin fans, turned themselves in and were taken to jail.

Stinky Bob and Hairy Sack cradled Mary between them, weeping in soul-deep loss.

"I've done... what I came to do..." she gasped on. "Only one... part... of the vision... remains."

Taking Stinky Bob's hand in one of her slimy ones and Hairy Sack's in the other, she pushed them together.

"You are... fated.... to be one," she gurgled. "Love... each other..."

As the last exhalation of her skanky breath passed between her smelly lips, Stinky Bob and Hairy Sack looked at each other, knowing in their hearts that Mary Sue had not only saved their lives with her rancid sacrifice, but had also given them a gift: the gift of their love for one another. A gift that would fuck them until death and beyond.

They owed her a debt that could never be repaid.

The End.

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