RECOVERING METH ADDICT -- Recovery Works Resource Center

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Subject: RECOVERING METH ADDICT

Author:
CINDY ODOM

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Date Posted: 12:22:01 04/19/05 Tue

MY NAME IS CINDY I AM A 25 YEAR OLD MOTHER AND RECOVERYING METH ADDICT. i HAVE BEEN CLEN FOR EIGHT MONTHS NOW. IT HAS NOT BEEN EASY TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH IT HAS BEEN ONE OF THE HARDEST THINGS I HAVE EVER DONE. BUT WITH MY FAMILYS SUPPORT, A RETURN TO MY FAITH AND A HARD LOOK AT THE I REGRET, I HAVE LEFT MY PREVIOUS DRUG LIFE AND THE PEOPLE IN IT BEHIND. I LOST EVERYTHING WHEN METH ENTERED MY LIFE. lIFE BECAME ONE BIG PARTY. I WAS TO FAR GONE TO LISTEN TO ANYONE. NOW CLEAN I LOOK BACK ON THE IMPACT MY DRUG USE HAD ON MY SON. I MISSED SEEING HIM GROW UP. SO MUCH HAD HAPPENED IN MY LIFE THAT I CANNNOT CHANGE. I HAVE HURT ALOT OF PEOPLETHAT LOVE ME. I USED METH TO SHUT OFF MY EMOTIONS BECAUSE I DIDNT WANT TO FEEL HURT. FOR ME I HAD TO BE PUT IN JAIL TO FORCE MYSELF TO LOOK AT MY PROBLEM. I HAD BEEN HIGH ON METH EVERYDAY USING, I HAD NOT BEEN THINKING THE WAY I KNEW HOW TOO. THE PERSON I WAS AND THE PERSON I BECAME VERY DIFFERENT. THE DRUG HAD TAKEN ITS TOLL ON ME I WAS ALWAYS SICK AND DEPRESSED. AFTER GETTING OUT OF JAIL I FIANLLY SOUGHT HELP FOR MY ADDICTION. MY SO CALLLED FRIENDS DISSAPPERED BUT MY FAMILY STAYED BY MY SIDE. I ATTENTED A 90 DAY REHAB. THERE I FOUND OUT I WAS NOT ALONE. I LEARNED HOW TO DEAL WITH PROBLEMS GOOD OR BAD WITHOUT USING. I TRIED TO HANG OUT WITH OLD FRIENDS BUT WHILE SITTING THERE I REALIZED THE ONLY THING THAT HAD CHANGED WERE THEIR ADDRESS. EVERYTHING ELSE WAS THE SAME IF NOT WORSE. I HAVE TO MANY THINGS GOING FOR ME AND MY FAMILYS TRUST. THERE IS NOT A DAY THAT GOES BY THAT I DONT THINK ABOUT USING BUT I KNOW I DONT EVER WANT TO GO BACK THERE. I DONT WANNA SPEND ANOTHER DAY OR SHOULD I SAY WASTE ANOTHER DAY ON METH. I HAVE THE CHOICE AND I CHOOSE LIFE. I WOULD TELL ANYONE THAT IS USING OR THINKING ABOUT IT THAT YOU THINK THE DRUG IS GREAT YOU THINK YOU HAVR ALL THESE FRIENDS JUST WAIT YOUR IN FOR A LONG BUMPY DEAD END. I NEVER DREAMED THAT I WOULD DO SOME OF THE THINGS I DID DURING MY DRUG USE. I TURNED INTO SOMEONE EVERYONE INCLUDING MY SELF HATED. METH IS A MONSTER AND IT IS HARD TO LEAVE BEHIND BUT IT IS POSSIBLE. I KNOW KNOW THAT I HAVE THE STRENGTH TO OVER COME ANY OBSTACLE.

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