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Date Posted: 01:00:25 07/04/07 Wed
Author: Assistant to the Commissioner General
Author Host/IP: 124.180.185.45
Subject: Round 8 Results. Titanic top of the table clash turns into a thriller

TOP OF THE TABLE CLASH SEES SHADOWS DISAPPEAR
===================================================
Swangunners 26 13 169 def Darkness Eternal 23 18 156

The much awaited top of the table clash between 2007's Cinderella side and last years premiers turned out to be a classic. With The Shadows holding a well earned 2 goal lead at half time, Horse's men went to the sheds with a determined look, and came out to produce a stunning brand of premiership football. Piling on 9 goals to 4 to amass a 3 goal lead by quarters end. The Shadows had effectively disappeared as clouds engulfed the 3/4 time huddle with The General pleading with his men for one last effort. To no avail, as the Gunners cruised to a 13 point win

MUTLEY FIRES THE SHOTS. DOWN GOES THE PISS POTS
================================================
Elliots Last Shout 24 23 167 lost to Wakky Races 28 8 176

The much improvd Wacky Races, ventured out to Optarse on Saturday, and in a surprise result came home with the chocolates. Someone must have put Gatorade in the beer lines out at Optarse during the week because Elliots boys just couldn't get themselves into the game. The further it went the worse it seemed to get. In the end it was the Wacky's by a mere 9 points. Said Mutley, "We rode them hands and heels all game, we knew they were there but always felt we had their measure. They just seemed off their game today". Pigs Arrssee has replaced all social club bar staff, in a move designed to ensure that the team is fed beer in the social club. "We don't want any of our players drinking that poof drink Gatorade. Thats for shirtlifters like soccer players. You wont find those types in an ELS team.

LAXATIVES SINK IN THEIR OWN MIRE
======================================================
VVS Laxatives 18 15 123 lost to McHale's Navy 25 15 165

In what was easily the worst performance by any team in the RFL this year, former power house the VVS Laxatives have been belted by 7 goals by the similarly troubled Navy. The once again Jovial Jock said I hate coming to this place. It has that distinct feeling of home yet I hate it. The ground is like a Collingwood sewer, only filled with 150,000 screaming stinking sweaty peasants with bad dental hygene. It all seems familiar we should feel at home, yet we have always found it such a hard place to record a win at. To do it, and save my coaching career at the same time was a pleasing result.

In a statement issued by the VVS Laxatives, The Nawab has promised changes for next week.


WOLVES PARTY WITH THE ANIMALS
===========================================================
University Wolves 23 14 152 lost to Party Animals 23 22 160

Coach Sly the Magnificent is a shattered man this evening as he contemplates a loss that should never have happened. Leading comfortably all day, Sly's men started the celebrations 20 minutes early, allowing the Groovers to pile on 9 goals in a stunning last quarter to run out 8 point winners. Molly was astounded. Screaming to anyone who cared to listen, "Do yourself a favour. Go out and get a copy of this game on DVD. The Groovers sure no how to hit the high notes". By the looks of Molly as he left the ground, he looked certain to party hard and long into the night down at Linton St. to celebrate the unexpected victory.







Team Played Won Lost Draw For Against Percentage Points
Swan Gunners 8 7 1 0 1378 1180 116.78 28
Party Animals 8 5 3 0 1295 1236 104.77 20
Wakky Races 8 5 3 0 1273 1224 104.00 20
Darkness Eternal 8 5 3 0 1297 1295 100.15 20
McHale's Navy 8 4 4 0 1282 1308 98.01 16
Elliot's Last Shout 8 3 5 0 1275 1305 97.70 12
University Wolves 8 2 6 0 1152 1279 90.07 8
VVS Laxatives 8 1 7 0 1180 1300 90.77 4

Full Results.















TEAM G B P TEAM G B P
SWANGUNNERS V DARKNESS ETERNAL
Forward Forward
Tredrea 0 0 0 Russell Robbo 3 2 20
Pavlich 4 3 27 Nick Reiwoldt 4 0 24
Lloyd 4 2 26 Richo 3 1 19
Midfield Midfield
Cooney 4 1 25 Adam Simpson 4 3 27
Kerr 5 2 32 Nathan Foley 3 3 21
Harvey 4 3 27 Jimmy Bartel 1 1 7
Ruck Ruck
Sandilands (DNP) Brad Ottens 3 5 23
Tackler Tackler
McDonald 4 1 25 Michael Rischitelli 2 3 15
Emerg Emerg
Goodes (Ruck) 1 1 7 Kane Pettifer
TOTAL 26 13 169 TOTAL 23 18 156

















TEAM G B P TEAM G B P
ELLIOTS LAST SHOUT V WACKY RACES
Forward Forward
Brown, J 4 1 25 Tarrant (DNP)
Johnson, Brad 3 1 19 Mooney 4 1 25
Darcy 0 1 1 Corey Jones 2 3 15
Midfield Midfield
McLeod 3 3 21 Chad Cornes 5 2 32
West 3 4 22 Scott Thompson 4 1 25
Houlihan, R 2 5 17 Chad Fletcher (DNP) 5 0 30
Ruck Ruck
Charman 3 4 22 White 4 0 24
Tackler Tackler
Kirk 6 4 40 Casissi 4 1 25
Emerg Emerg
Hasleby Tyson Edwards (fwd) 0 0 0
TOTAL 24 23 167 TOTAL 28 8 176

















TEAM G B P TEAM G B P
VVS LAXATIVES V McHALES NAVY
Forward Forward
Bruce 1 0 6 Lucas 5 1 31
Ablett G. 2 0 12 Didak 2 0 12
Welsh 0 1 1 Gehrig 5 3 33
Midfield Midfield
J Bowden 5 1 31 K Cornes 3 0 18
Goodwin (DNP) S Black 1 5 11
Crawford 4 1 25 Lockyer
Ruck Ruck
MacIntosh 3 5 23 Cox 4 1 25
Tackler Tackler
Josh Carr 3 2 20 J Bolton 5 5 35
Emerg Emerg
Jolly (Midfield) 0 5 5 Milne
TOTAL 18 15 123 TOTAL 25 15 165

















TEAM TEAM
UNIVERSITY WOLVES V PARTY ANIMALS
Forward Forward
Franklin 4 0 24 Fevola 1 2 8
Ebert 1 1 7 Neitz 3 1 19
Schulz (DNP) Lynch 1 0 6
Midfield Midfield
Hayes 3 4 22 Mitchell 4 4 28
Swan 5 0 30 Scotland 3 5 23
Priddus 4 4 28 Hodge 2 4 16
Ruck Ruck
Fraser 3 3 21 Everitt 2 3 15
Tackler Tackler
Harris 3 2 20 Ball 7 3 45
Emerg Emerg
Lewis (Fwd) 0 0 0 O'Loughlin
TOTAL 23 14 152 TOTAL 23 22 160


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