Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your
contribution is not tax-deductible.)
PayPal Acct: 
Feedback: 
Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):
| [ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, 2, 3, 4 ] |
| Subject: thank you | |
|
Author: kristen |
[
Next Thread |
Previous Thread |
Next Message |
Previous Message
]
Date Posted: 12:03:55 05/05/05 Thu In reply to: Meredith 's message, "Meredith extending love to Kristin" on 11:43:33 05/05/05 Thu Thank you Mer. It is good to hear from you on here. :) I was going to ask Rob to delete the above self-pity email, but since you responded to it i wont. Abstinence is the single greatest challenge of my life. And the key to me even having a life at this point. I have known this for a year and four months now. I just saw how good life could be really clearly. That is really intense to feel into... I can not believe how difficult it is for me to do it just for one day. I do attend the meetings here on the peninsula. As for your relationship with Ted, I cannot even begin to have any real awareness around what it is like to be in a relationship like yours and Ted's - i have never had anything near that level of vulnerability and closeness with a man. I do envy that - yes, but moreover and much more so I envy that you are abstinent and you do it a day at a time. I envy every one who is willing. And i envy that you live there in Brisbane because i think that living there is the best gift one can give themselves as far as growing in self-awareness, that is if you are in a place of wanting to grow, there is much to be reaped. So much. I have been wanting to not grow. I have been wanting to believe that I am ok without abstinence. But there is really no way I could ever actually believe that when i get honest with myself. "The program is a gift" someone 60 year old said to me. She said "Kristen Take it. Or you will go another 30 years and end up like me." Anger really doesnt get us anywhere does it? If it did I would be a Very successful woman. :) loveK [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] |