The scene opens with a empty arena. The only person that
can be seen is a janitor sweeping up the floor. Then, in the distance, The
Enforcer walks in at the top of the arena. The camera zooms in on
him. His hair has been cut short and died a dark brown. He has a five o'
clock shadow. He is wearing a Harley-Davidson shirt and a tie-died sweat
pants. He looks around, then begins to focus solely on the camera.
He smiles and begins to walk down the stairs. He pulls a mic out of his
pocket and begins to speak. The janitor looks up and shakes his
head.
Hello, HWA fans, wrestlers, and suits
alike. It's The Enforcer here to bring you a public service announcement.
Yes, I know, it's after hours at the HWA arena and it seems kinda odd, it being
empty like this, but bear with me... Do you know what today is? Yes,
it's February 14th, but what else is it? That's right, it's Valentine's
Day. A day to tell that special someone that you love them. Oh yes,
that special day where you go out and buy chocolates in a heart shaped box, a
stuffed animal, and a sappy card to tell that person that you want to spend the
day with them... you look them in the eye and say in your sweetest voice,
"Will you be my Valentine?" Then, for a split second you are
completely unaware of the world... that person answers... "Yes,"
they say, " I would love too." There is nothing in the world
that can stop you from feeling like a god! That's right, and maybe, just
maybe that person will even want to be with you on February 15... and maybe even
for the rest of your life. Isn't that GREAT!
He reaches the bottom of the stairs and
begins to walk to the half torn down ring. He reaches his hand under it
and pulls out four gifts. He carries them over to a chair and sits down
and continues.
But I have four Valentine gifts here...
each for a special person in my life right now. The first one is for
Marcey, my wife. She isn't here right now, so I'll set it aside for
tonight.
He takes a small box off the floor and
puts it into his pocket.
Now the next one isn't for anyone I have a
crush on, it's for a person who I used to look up to, until he betrayed me to
some damn clowns...
He smiles very big.
But I'm not bitter. See, Sean, if I
was... I wouldn't have gotten you this gift. I'll unwrap it for you right
now, I am just so anxious! LOOK! I did it myself... It's a picture of the
new Enforcers! Of course, I had to stick some gum over the "S",
since there is only one hero in the HWA...
All right, moving on... I have short story
to tell. You know I travel quite a bit. Lately I have been staying
at some raggedy motels in order to save a little money. Anyhow, the last
one I stayed at was so bad that instead of the Gideon's Bible, they had a copy
of Dante's Inferno... What's worse is that the sixth ring of hell, was
mark "You are Here." You may think I have lost my mind, but I
thought that our Dante would appreciate that story. Now back to the
presents... The next one is for Dante himself... again, I will go ahead and
unwrap it for you... Look Dante, just what a man like yourself needs
on Valentine's day... a big bottle of HAND LOTION. Yes, that's right...
everything that I described earlier in one easy to handle bottle. Think
about it Dante, no need to go out and struggle to find a date this year, you have
one right here!
Now, Jason, I know your getting anxious as
to what your gift might be... But don't be, I have it right here.
He sets the picture and the hand lotion
aside. He picks the third gift up off the floor. He begins to open
it.
Now, Jason, don't get all mushy when you
see what I got you, and remember keep your hands to yourself... Don't try to
give me a hug or anything like that... The Enforcer is just doing his
job...
The Enforcer is finishing unwrapping the
gift. He hold it up... It's a pair of red high heel shoes.
Now, I know your thinking that I'm crazy,
and you're right, but that's beside the point. Here is the point: You and
yourself tonight... you need a date? No one wants to a loser's Valentine,
well, here ya go... be your own date.
Well, I think I have chosen four really
great gifts. I hope Sean, Dante, and Jason like them as well.
Anyhow... I have a bit of a match tomorrow... It's against both Dante and
Jason... am I worried? No, neither one of them is much of a wrestler, or for
that matter, a man.
He rises from the chair and begins to
walk away.
Oh, Happy Valentine's Day, HWA and
especially to Sean, Dante, Jason.... Anyhow, I must be off to celebrate the
holiday with my special sweetheart, Marcey. So, until Friday, Farewell my
friends!
The Janitor watches The Enforcer
leave. He glances at the three gifts and walks over and picks up the
shoes. The Janitor sits down on the chair and takes off his boots.
He slips into the high heel shoes and stands up. He continues to mop for a
moment, then realizes that the other two gifts are still there. He picks
up the picture and then, after looking at the lotion, picks it up as well.
He quickly walks out out the arena.
Scene fades.
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