Re: I don't know why, but... -- The PM Refugees' Forum

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Date Posted: 17:26:11 06/28/09 Sun
Author: Samantha
Subject: Re: I don't know why, but...
In reply to: Johnny Reb 's message, "Re: I don't know why, but..." on 17:32:24 06/25/09 Thu

>Language is a matter of the brain and has something to
>do with the heart, too. If he lives in your country,
>he should learn your language (and definitely not only
>for you). If you live in his country, you should learn
>his language. Without verbal communication, an
>intellectual exchange is not possible.

We are both from (and kive in) the same country. He is from a small village that is part of a far city, while I am from the capital. We both speak the same language, which is not English. I started to think in English since I was tudying English literature in the university.. and I still think in English, and when I speak to him, or try to explain my thoughts to him.. I would be translating...

>It is nice of him if he accompanies you to the movies
>(what is so bad about enjoying a movie all on your
>own, btw?)

I don't like going to the movies alone. I always had this problem. My female friends are either not into movies or too busy to spend 2+ hours watching something they could watch at home while tyding dusting or cooking.
if he is not interested in movies.

> But why does he do it then? Does he expect and/or get a reward for it?

He says he likes to do things that make me happy.. He is a very simple and nice guy.

>If he has less formal education than you, this is a
>gap which can be bridged over time as you can get him
>interested in learning and gaining knowledge, so one
>day he will be on your level (or similar) of
>education.

I tried to make him read some books.. I even bought him one and told him I wanted to know what he thinks of the type of books I like. But he said he didn't like reading.

>Where I see the real problem is that he is part of a
>(foreign?) culture which has very different values
>compared to yours. Especially about the gender topic,
>this might be a gap which can never be bridged at all
>if is he is not willing to adjust to your (host)
>country's culture and values.

Where I come from is far more conservative than where he does.. it is not a matter of culture, it is more his personality and type of thinking.

>
>I wonder what it is that you have in common at all but
>I do not necessarily need to know.

I wonder about that too.

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Replies:

Re: I don't know why, but... -- Johnny Reb, 04:00:48 07/02/09 Thu