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Subject: Blood Moon Memoir (Sestina) Author: Sasha [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 12:32:38 12/22/07 Sat Blood Moon Memoir Sing the dark of night’s breath, whisper the blood of moon come, my wild wind lover I’ll slake the crave for touch your man ink on my lips your fire to light my curves Fall to silk woman curves as night-sky-stolen breath pours tender to love’s lips and calls the aching moon to bless this beckoned touch… such a hungry lover Cry amethyst, lover, whisper rain to soft curves you know she craves your touch she’ll take your swollen breath and sing it to the moon… a chorus from her lips Soothe heat spills from fire lips to romance his lover, and smiles the swaying moon licking the smooth of curves to her quickening breath… slave to his glide deep touch The quiver breeze of touch, drifts soft to moistened lips consumes her night mink breath, shy-skin-willow lover sways gentle to her curves… so sings the bleeding moon slick, flows the milk of moon, when blessed with linger touch the lush of valley curves and rolling mists to lips, for no other lover pours smooth his dying breath Milking the breath of moon two lover’s reach to touch lips pressed to true love’s curves © Sasha ‘06 [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Subject: Re: Blood Moon Memoir (Sestina) Author: Jess [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05:54:57 12/27/07 Thu Sestina's are certainly hard. This one is lyrical and soft. I like, I like! Thanks for posting this...if my muse ever comes back, perhaps I'll try another. I've certainly established that I need waaaaay more than 5 or 7 syllables to say all I need to! This will be great to come back to again and again to be inspired. The moon is a fertile symbol. Jess [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Blood Moon Memoir (Sestina) Author: Sasha [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 11:54:45 12/27/07 Thu ~ (((((((((Jess))))))))) you're right about the moon, Jess...I adore it... and this piece was part of a 31 days of poetry Challenge a couple years ago, and I didn't want to write it but if I didn't I'd fail the challenge, and my competitive side wouldn't let me do that..haha. Perhaps I'll try the form again one day, but I found the 6 syllable lines and the rhymes scheme really hard to do.... thanks for stopping by, hon...your comment smiled my morning *hugs* Sash xx . [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: Blood Moon Memoir (Sestina) Author: Jess [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 18:47:25 12/28/07 Fri Oh, 6 syllables. I see why mine didn't fit into your conception of a sestina. I never heard that restriction, and anyway, syllable restrictions just aren't my forte. I try, but then I get one I want to keep and that just blows it out of the water. I try to compare myself to Emily Dickinson in that way; like her rhymes that are just shy of truly rhyming, my syllables don't quite cram in there. At least that's how I defend myself! ...call me loquacious! lol ciao! Jess [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Blood Moon Memoir (Sestina) Author: Sasha [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 23:24:20 12/28/07 Fri ~ awww Jess, you have nothing to defend, hon...honest I'm so sorry if it came across like I was picking at your poem it was just different to what I had experienced that's all.. and hell, I'm hardly ever right..lol you rock...and I love that you're here with us, and that you aren't afraid to step outside your comfort zone...love that!!! *big-as hugs* Sash xx . [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Blood Moon Memoir (Sestina) Author: Jess [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 06:40:57 12/29/07 Sat Oh, no, you didn't. If you were to, I'd love the critique. This is a wonderful, supportive place, but I wonder if perhaps you should have a room for some friendly criticism. I don't ever think of my work as finished, and sometimes it's good to hear someone else's take and what does and doesn't work. You didn't pick at anything, you were adorably kind as always and i love you for it! Mwah! Jess [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Blood Moon Memoir (Sestina) Author: Sasha [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 13:57:20 12/29/07 Sat ~ oh I'm like you in that my poetry is never really finished I often revisit my older stuff to see how it could be improved so, thanks for the suggestion, dear one...we really appreciate your input *warm hugs* Sash xx . [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Blood Moon Memoir (Sestina) Author: Mick [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 12:49:15 01/01/08 Tue Well, I've only written one sestina and it was a royal pain in the arse :), so, I know how this form can be a struggle. You did an excellent job as always. To me, there is a certain inherent annoyance about this form - I think it's the rotating/repeating end word (not your poem, just this form); so, whilst I chose a theme of rats in my house for my sestina, I was impressed that you worked your theme into this form - very nice. I guess the obsessiveness of lust works well in this form. Anyway, as always you have weaved your magic and enlightened me. Again, well done. One question from my own ignorance: are six-syllable lines a restriction of this form or is it just consistent syllable count? I used 10 in mine and was just curious if I goofed. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]