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Subject: Searching for Ivy Author: Angela [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 23:51:26 09/09/24 Mon Hi Ivy! I am Taylor, Kevin and Shannon's mom; a ghost from the past in "Spank With Love --Family Forum." I heard you were looking for Taylor, your pal from the kids' forum, and one place you posted an inquiry(somewhat to my surprise) was this board. I know Taylor would love to get back in touch with you. When you have time, and have access to social, drop a line here and I will get you a private link. I used to chat with your mom, but with you kids growing up and the forum falling apart and disappearing; after fifteen or so years, we also are no longer in touch and I can not find any links or personal info. Please let her know and maybe we can reunite also! God Bless, and Peace be with you, Angela [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Subject: Re: Searching for Ivy Author: Rebecca [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 09:33:10 09/10/24 Tue Glad to meet you. I am also a mom who would have appreciated that old "Spank With Love" forum . There is nothing like it today. Ivy appears to have grownup to become an impressive young lady. Although she is too modest to say that, if she did I have the distinct impression she would give a lot of credit to her mom, and her adolescent intervention. Ivy's story is interesting, in one way or the other, to most of the participants in this forum. Apparently Ivy is now on some kind of mission with her IDF unit, and is out of Internet communication for a while. However about a week ago she sent the forum a postcard:https://www.voy.com/243310/56705.html She has mentioned Taylor and I am sure she will be excited to see your message. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: Searching for Ivy Author: Alfred22 [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 07:41:42 09/11/24 Wed Isn't Taylor the sister of P.J.? [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Searching for Ivy Author: Angela [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 14:35:18 09/12/24 Thu Alfred, Realized I did not post my reply in the proper place. To repeat: No. He is Benji's cousin. Were you in the group or the family forum? Angela [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Searching for Ivy Author: Angela [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 08:31:55 09/11/24 Wed No. He is Benji's cousin. Were you in the group or the family forum? [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Searching for Ivy Author: Smith [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 04:46:21 09/12/24 Thu That forum was an interesting concept. Only found out about it last month just like this one. Any idea why it didn't last that long? Most of the content is only from the early 2010's. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: Searching for Ivy Author: Angela [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 14:26:33 09/12/24 Thu The original creator-moderator fell quite ill and turned it over to an individual who was, to say the least, less than adequate. Soon admission standards were reduced to nothing,. Soon tales, like those which fill this forum, obviously inappropriate for this type of forum, began to fill our forum. Perhaps worst of all some of it , like portions of the kids' group, were surreptitiously opened to/or hacked by lurkers everywhere. The “Spank With Love” forum spectacularly crashed as original members ran toward the exit. I might as well add, I don't think a forum like that is possible today, and probably was not then. Although admission standards, especially to the kids' group, were very high that alone was not enough to make it permanently safe and useful. We had to send in written documents providing the kids' age and they had to be orally interviewed, as did we by the moderator. In addition we and the moderator, had to approve of every post our kids' made. But it all depended on the good will of one mortal man, whose health failed him. That plus the technical aspects and increasing challenges of properly running anything like this make me think it more than inadvisable today. Angela [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Searching for Ivy Author: Smith [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 03:17:29 09/18/24 Wed Apologies for the late response, and thank you for your answer. With the explanation you gave, it is indeed interesting how the forum could manage to exist yes. Well, it's sad to hear how it went. Did you keep contact with the moderator after he left? Personally, I have no business with the group myself. However, reading some of the stories and comparing it with my own time in the early 2010's is an interesting experience. I wonder what has become of most users and wish we could talk to them. That is, if they have no problem with that. I wish you luck with bringing some of the group back together. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: Searching for Ivy Author: Alfred22 [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 22:49:35 09/13/24 Fri Greetings Angela, My memory has things blurred. There was PJ who had a kidney ailment. I think his left kidney that he nicknamed "Lefty" failed and had to be removed. I think there was Caleb and he has posted here I think. I don't recall Benji. They were all very articulate and really good kids. Taylor was/is an excellent writer and I am sure she makes you a very proud Mom. I would appreciate another check as to how accurate my memory is. Did you once have a change in your schedule come up and force you to change plans? The change in plans required Taylor to cut short her watching a team practice and promptly return to you and Shannon waiting in the car. Taylor tells Shannon to say she is staying and will ride home with you when you come for brother Kevin. She, Taylor, didn't know about your change in plans, etc. So, Messenger Shannon was caught in the middle and Taylor ended up in big trouble for being willful. She had her ankle in the cast. What is memorable about the whole incident is that you proposed the spanking she had clearly earned. She said No you can't spank me; I have an injured ankle. Then you said I am going to spank only your bottom! And that is what you did! I probably have this story a bit wrong. I can identify slightly with Taylor having had a "stick fracture" of my left leg fibula bone and having no choice but to go on a two day overnight canoe trip. Uncasted fractures feel any impact anywhere on the body. But Taylor had her cast at that point. So Mom was fully justified in paddling her bottom, given her direct disobedience of an order to return to the car. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: Searching for Ivy Author: Angela [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 15:00:23 09/14/24 Sat Alfred, PJ had a number of of challenges thrown at him -- the medical as well as family. His mother sent him to live with his uncle, who is a pastor. The uncle not only gave PJ the discipline he needed, but strength, love and comfort in the Lord. I do vaguely recall the incident you referred to. Taylor got the least spankings of any of our kids, but sometimes!!! That one I probably would have given her a break if she had not lamely and defiantly said I couldn't spank her since she had an injured ankle. Oh yeah :( The group, until it started falling apart, was good. As a parent I had to keep on top of it to approve messages. I hope Ivy is doing well and will check in so I can connect her with Taylor. God Bless and Peace be with you, Angela [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Searching for PJ and the old gang --For Angela Author: Alfred22 [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 15:24:35 09/14/24 Sat PJ seemed to speak of his uncle as his Dad. I had the impression that PJ was Paterson James just as was his "father." He was a very loving and kind young man. No complaints about his life. I hope things are going well for him. Last I heard he wanted to be a pastor also. God works in wondrous ways. I wish him the best. Taylor was a superb citizen of the group and never published anything negative about you or about spanking. I do remember some kid or other speaking about her family not having a spanking paddle and Taylor volunteered hers! It was a joke but she did praise the family paddle! Sort of. Thank you so much for the update. A group like this even would have been so helpful to me growing up. Having loving adults involved and genuinely concerned about how kids feel and how they can learn and benefit from discipline. Best wishes, connecting Ivy and the old gang! [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Searching for PJ and the old gang --For Angela Author: Angela [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 16:12:49 09/14/24 Sat Alfred, I don't know your connection with the group, but thanks for the praise. It was a good thing, but with experience and hindsight I would not endorse an effort to resurrect anything like it, as I discussed earlier with Smith. Taylor was a corker, and certainly not a fan of the paddle;) But she ,along with Ivy and a number of the kids did have very thoughtful conversations about discipline, which helped them grow. And their conversations also helped parents, at least me. Angela [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Searching for PJ and the old gang --For Angela Author: Alfred22 [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 21:58:54 09/14/24 Sat Discipline and maturity need to coexist, even when immaturity leads to deep resentment of a temporary nature. I think forum conversations can lead to the wisdom to accept and even to appreciate discipline albeit painful. Two examples, after many years, I finally understood why I deserved the beltline spanking I got in Scouts. After even more years, I realized why overtime parking could only be managed with parking tickets and that I deserved the $23 fine. For the Scouts' penalty I had to run the gauntlet only once. But it was a cold night and I remember going from cold to a red hot bottom in twenty seconds or so. For many years after, I just resented it, resented the others who had in effect ratted us out, ... But after some reflection on the events of that evening, I realize how necessary the water paranoia of BSA is. There are sacred waterfront rules and precautions that make scouts everywhere safe and I broke several of them! In the parking ticket case, I avoided the whole town which wrote me up. My quiet boycott. As an adult I finally reflected on parking management and realized that without tickets, drivers just parked and often never moved their cars. There are few alternatives to tickets to keep people from just settling in on a particular spot. In the town and commercial area in question, there is literally no alternative since boots and towing require resources not readily available. In both cases, I was totally and without question guilty. I knew about the rules and chose to break them. The rules were reasonable and so I should not resent the punishments. This took a long time. Maybe if I had told the story on this board, I would have accepted my belt licks and the fine a decade sooner! [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Searching for PJ and the old gang --For Angela Author: Ivy [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 14:42:08 09/16/24 Mon Taylor was not a fan of the paddle, but she was less a fan of your hairbrush. I can relate😫 Thank you for posting. I would love to get in touch with her! Shalom☺️ Ivy [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: To Ivy Author: Angela [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 21:34:37 09/16/24 Mon Hi Ivy! Just so you know there was a method in my madness on whether the kiddos earned the paddle or my hairbrush! Very impressive on what you have shared of your life. I don't know if Taylor will want to post on this forum, but she very much would like to get together with you. I posted an encrypted temporary email on my name. Drop a line with identifying information and I will hook you two up. Great to hear from you, Angela [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: To Ivy Author: Taylor [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 21:03:55 09/17/24 Tue Hi Everyone. Ivy and I have been catching up --wow! I am a social worker, now working in my Uncle's parish as a youth director. I am married and have two children, and yes --I believe in spanking. Looking forward to meeting you and exchanging ideas and experiences. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: To Ivy Author: Smith [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 04:08:45 09/18/24 Wed Hi Taylor. Welcome. Does this mean you'll become a frequent user here? Eager to have a conversation as well, and to hear what stories you want to share. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: To Ivy Author: Taylor [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 09:53:03 09/18/24 Wed Thank you! I don't know frequently I will be contributing. At first I thought I would have nothing to add. But I was wrong, and immediately found an important philosophical/psychological/spiritual issue and was happy to share. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Searching for PJ and the old gang --For Angela Author: HowardKM [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 06:17:12 09/15/24 Sun Benji is the cousin of PJ And Caleb, whose mother sent him to live with his Uncle Pat and Aunt Karen. He tells his story here:https://www.voy.com/228811/857.html [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Searching for PJ and the old gang --For Angela Author: Angela [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 13:58:03 09/15/24 Sun I did not know any of the old forum was still alive online. But this really shows the level and nature of conversation on it. Not that all of it was that serious. And in point of fact much of what the kids talked about had nothing to do with spanking. Angela [ Post a Reply to This Message ]