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Date Posted: 19:10:51 10/28/24 Mon
Author: Curious
Author Host/IP: 49.196.42.140
Subject: (SFFR) Bad Penny (NZLucy) - A Review

Warning - This Review Contains Spoilers

Bad Penny (NZLucy) - A Review

Part One - The Author

The author is one of a crop of new smoking fetish author's who've recently become active.

Part Two - Bad Penny

The first person perspective story, covers how the 18 year old protagonist, joins her father at his new place at work.

Part Three - Comments

The author states in their introductory note that this is their first story and asks for comment. The first thing I noticed was an editing glitch, in the opening paragraphs the character 'Michelle' is referred to as 'Shelly' at one point, but nowhere else in the story. In this case, it's a distraction rather than a major issue. But it's something the author should keep an eye out for. 'Loring Era' writer An4 had a problem with keeping character names consistent during the course of the same story.(1)

One surprising plot element in the story is that the protagonists parents are separated, having just read an anthology(2) where all the stories use that as a background plot element, I'm starting to wonder if this is becoming a trope amongst smoking fetish writers.

More concerning is the abrupt way in which the protagonist makes their decision to try smoking, there's no real build up towards it and in a first person story, that is important and then there are final revelations which, aside from being a definite shift towards the darker end of the smoking fetish(3), seem unprepared for by what's come before it.

I consider the story overall to be a reasonable first start, there are issues, but all of them can be solved if the author is willing to take the time to plot the story out before hand.

It get's a soft recommendation. I look forward to the authors other stories.

Notes:

1. See for example my review in the 7th volume of the Consolidated Smoking Fetish Fiction Review covering 'It's Been A While', the last known part of the 'Hunting Vampires' series for a good example of this issue. Another example from this author is the series formed by the stories 'The Cameo' and 'Under Her Wing', the link is obscured by the renaming of a particular character. Reviews of the stories can be found in the 14th and 17th volumes of the Consolidated Smoking Fetish Fiction Review series.
2. The anthology which is available on Amazon, is entitled 'Written Of Smoke (1): Beginnings' and is credited to Daniel Gary Leon, a review will appear in the forthcoming 28th volume of the Consolidated Smoking Fetish Fiction Review series.
3. See for example An02's story '1974' which makes use of a similar idea, a review can be found in the 1st volume of the Consolidated Smoking Fetish Fiction review series.

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