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Date Posted: 17:27:56 11/25/99 Thu
Author: Mat Blaster
Subject: Canadian cripple and Outhouse

Michael Cole stands in the ring and introduces Mat Blaster>

MC: Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm proud to introduce one of the founding Members of the Society of Destruction, MAT BLASTER

(Instead of Mat Blaster's usual music, Dudley Do Right Music comes on. Mat Blaster walks out dressed as a Canadian mountie, riding a stick horse)

MB: Whoa,Who wants some destruction aah?
(crowd erupts in laughter I want some destruction)

MC: What is with the new outfit Mat Blaster?

MB: AAH, The Blaster,just like these Canadian pussy police,always gets his man, come Monday, Corey "the chef" Chefson.

MC: That's Corey "the cooker" Cookson

MB: yeah whatever, CHEF, After monday you will be begging for McDonald's to hire you. Do they have McDonald's in Canada, it is probably McIce, or McDamnitscold. Anyway, what the Blaster is saying is YOUR WRESTLING CAREER IS OVER. And your title is mine. Now as for you buddy,Outhouse, Friday, You will learn two things, one why you will never get a title shot in this Fed and two, Why the SOCIETY IS THE MOST EXCITING GROUP OF ATHLETES IN WRESTLING TODAY. (CROWD ERUPTS)

MC: You sound sure that you will win, even with all of Corey's rules for the title match!

MB: AAH, Only a figure skating, zambonie driving, frenchie speaking Canadian, could come up with a lamer sounding match. Chef.

MC: that's cooker

MB: whatever, you could come up with any style of Match you want, it won't help you one bit. When you beat the Terrific One, you had all the advantages, he had the biggest match in this feds history still to come, he had already wrestled how many matches to get to where he was and you still beat him on a fluck. Come monday, you will have no such advantage against the Blaster. And that Title will come back to the Society where it belongs. Now play my music for the Canadian fans!!!!

(crowd remains silent as Mat Blaster rides around the ring on his stick horse and dudley Do Right music plays)

MB: ok, ok, NOW PLAY MY MUSIC FOR THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!!!!

(Beautiful People starts as Mat Blaster rips of the Mountie Suit, throwing it into the crowd and walking away)

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