Date Posted:17:56:47 04/14/05 Thu Author: Chris Subject: 2nd gens and abuse - one thing to keep in mind In reply to:
PECAS
's message, "Re: well, my last post" on 16:50:47 04/14/05 Thu
I pray you may follow Christ if the abusive training have read about but have not yet experienced is suddenly and without warning forced upon you.
Many if not most 2nd gens don't experience the extreme abuse in form of training, inhibiting or enforcing marriage etc. because they are somewhat shielded by their parents. They won't do to their own children what they do to German or American students. Children are children. Plus, in Elias case, he is the son of one of the most respected missionary veteran. However, many of them experience other kinds of abuse, such as being neglected in their childhood (some, not all, and to various degrees).
2nd gens perceive UBF indeed differently from us who were recruited to and not born in UBF. First, as I said, they do not experience such an extreme training, and second, they are somewhat more accustomed to the usual abuse because they have lived with it from their childhood, and they don't notice it any more unless it is really extreme. As the book by VanVonderen explains, you get accustomed to spiritual abuse, your measure stick for abuse is more and more shifted until you regard something as normal which is actually highly abusive. This is of course particularly true for people who lived all their life in UBF.
That's the reason why many 2nd gens tend to simply not believe or understand the testimonies of UBF dropouts.
Also, while I firmly hold to my statement that UBF Cologne shows all typical problems of UBF overall, Elia is right in that UBF Cologne is not so extreme as for instance, Bonn or Chicago, and always had some people who were moderate and even dared to cautiously criticize leadership or entertained the hope of a "reform over time" and tried to slowly (very slowly) change things. 2nd gens and non-hardcore "German shepherds" have some increasing influence, since the leaders need them, they are considered their "fruit" and only hope and cannot be simply kicked out or ignored.
