Re: Please continue to think -- RSQUBF discussion forum

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Date Posted: 13:46:52 11/26/04 Fri
Author: PECAS
Subject: Re: Please continue to think
In reply to: A Christian Man 's message, "Re: Please continue to think" on 01:38:22 11/26/04 Fri

Christian Man wrote "I pose to any of you a question, How can anybody force you to do something you dont want to do ? (please do not answer with a response of brainwashing or brain wave manipulation, because they would have to be a darn good hypnotist to make me break up with my fionce, or leave my family, or give up seminary) No one there has ever even tried to do this! I mean it. How can someone force another person to get an abortion? Did they hold a gun to the person's head? This is America, in this country we are free. If any one of those things were done to me by someone in UBF, I would be out the door faster than you could say "Friday Meeting."

Many people who are not victims of abuse can easily say, 'if that were me, I would have allowed myself to be abused,' or 'if I was asked to do by someone, I would leave.' For example, I have heard women react to a story about another woman who was physically abused by her husband for many years state that they would have left the first time a beating occured. WI have also heard women respond to hearing about another woman being raped that 'she must have been asking for it or must have been irresponsible.'
This attitude demeans the victim. Basically, it implies that the victim has inferior intellectual, physical, emotional, or spiritual capabilities and therefore failed to prevent the abuse. Those who say they are not victims do not want to believe they themselves could have or already have been victims of abuse. Thus, they try to find some weakness in victims of abuse to make the case that abuse comes upon people who have some weakness that they do not have. For example, if I want to believe that I will not be the victim of spiritual abuse in UBF, I can claim that those who are victims of spiritual abuse have emotional problems of dependancy. Then, I can say to myself that I have no emnotional problem of dependency and will not be abused.
I have read Christian Man's and some other UBF members posts on this forum making this claim: if the victim is stong enough spiritually, emotionally, and/or intellectually, then he or she will not allow themselves to be controlled by UBF shepherds. However, without actually experiencing the struggle to decide whether or not to obey your shepherd, church leader, boss, Bible teacher, parents, or whomever authority figure when they ask you to do something against your conscience, then how can one make a claim that they would never allow themselves to become victims of abuse?

In Christ,

PECAS

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Replies:

Re: Please continue to think -- PECAS, 21:19:38 11/26/04 Fri